Ask Me Help Desk - My boyfriend only wants sex once a week

My boyfriend and I have been dating 3 months. We have been on vacation together and spend at least 4 to 5 days together each week. We have met each others parents and we say we love each other. We have a great relationship except for one thing... lack of sex! We only have sex once a week and sex only lasts about 5-10 minutes each time. I feel that I am not attractive to him because he never says he wants me or sex was great I can't wait to be with you again. I am 35 and he is 32 by the way. My boyfriend does live with his parents... could this be why he doesn't want to have sex with me? I am so confused because when I ask him is there anything I can do he shuts off or says he doesn't like to have sex at his parents. He is buying a house right now so he will be out in 2 months. Need advice!

Its only been 3 months, and lack of privacy is a big deal. But if he is this way now, he probably won't be that much better later. He is who he is after all, and some need sex more than others. You will know better if you make a year together.

Thanks! I know 3 months isn't that long so I will give it time and see what happens when we have more privacy!

Yes, many couples don't even start having sex for 3 or more months.

So where are you having sex back at your apartment ?

Have you both discussed birth control and use at least two types, ** perhaps he does not want to be a daddy right no.

And perhaps he is really not as interested in sex as he is a relationship with you.

If he is not lasting a long time, perhaps he has a performance issue and that is why he does not try to do it a lot. You need to talk to him, only he can tell you why

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck

Yes, many couples don't even start having sex for 3 or more months.

So where are you having sex back at your apartment ?

Have you both discussed birth control and use at least two types, ** perhaps he does not want to be a daddy right no.

and perhaps he is really not as interested in sex as he is a relationship with you.

If he is not lasting a long time, perhaps he has a performance issue and that is why he does not try to do it a lot. You need to talk to him, only he can tell you why

We have had sex at my place a couple of times but more at his place... when his parents are out of town. A couple of times when they were home also.
Yes we use protection so I don't think that scare of being a daddy is an issue.

We do have a great relationship and talk about our futire a lot so I know sex isn't what makes us have a great relationship but it should be more a part of it in my opinion.

I have talked to him but it seems that he doesn't want to talk about it so I feel uncomfortable now... this is why I am confused!

I try to initiate sex a fairly good amount and he turns me down... not in a rude way but says something like... "i have to go use the bathroom or I'm going to go make us some coffee". Then he will give me a kiss and walk downstairs... so frustrating. I love him very much but can't help but to wonder if he is looking at me as a friend and not a lover.

If he doesn't satisfy you then it is time to move on, you cannot make your boyfriend increase a crave that he just doesn't have.

Quote:

Originally Posted by talaniman

Its only been 3 months, and lack of privacy is a big deal. But if he is this way now, he probably won't be that much better later. He is who he is after all, and some need sex more than others. You will know better if you make a year together.

Lack of privacy lol my cousin lives at home with his mom and he and his girlfriend been together for 3 years and if their was lack of sex they would have been broken up already because sex is a deal breaker. Just like there's always room for Jello you can make time for sex even if it's a quickie.

Quote:

Originally Posted by bubblyface

We have had sex at my place a couple of times but more at his place....when his parents are out of town. A couple of times when they were home also.
Yes we use protection so I dont think that scare of being a daddy is an issue.

We do have a great relationship and talk about our futire alot so I know sex isn't what makes us have a great relationship but it should be more a part of it in my opinion.

I have talked to him but it seems that he doesn't want to talk about it so I feel uncomfortable now...this is why I am confused!

I try to initiate sex a fairly good amount and he turns me down...not in a rude way but says something like..."i have to go use the bathroom or I'm going to go make us some coffee". Then he will give me a kiss and walk downstairs...so frustrating. I love him very much but can't help but to wonder if he is looking at me as a friend and not a lover.

Sounds like my ex, she would turn me down and we started having sex when she wanted it like once a month but that was too much for her. I need a chick that wants it so much that I tell her that I need a break from sex which would never happen.