How many state and federal exemptions/allowances should I have to get the buck for the bang

Well, tough TV shows teaches us that being a police informer is more then enough.
U got somebody to snitch at?

For federal, claim SINGLE with ONE allowance; do the same for New York.

Do NOT have any New Jersey taxes withheld, because the tax credit New Jersey gives for the New York taxes paid will completely offset what you owe to New Jersey.