Ask Me Help Desk - Child Custody Modification

My ex boyfriend has court ordered physical custody of our daughter and I have visitations. He lives in Miami, where the case was heard, and I live in San Antonio, TX. In May of 2010 I picked my daughter up for the summer and she told me she does not like living with her father because he is very aggressive, is barely home, so she spent all day with his wife and he made her take cold showers when she talked in class. When I spoke with him and asked him he said it was OK for her to live with me as long as I don't apply for child support or any type of government assistance, which was fine by me. I didn't have funds for an attorney and didn't want him getting violent as we had already had a difficult time co parenting. She has been living with me since that time. She is doing excellent in school. Her father does not call and the last time they spoke was in June of 2011. I would like to modify the custody order to reflect our current situation. Should I file for a change in custody and should I do it in Texas or Florida. Her father has shown that he does not want to provide for her.
Thanks

This is a hard one. Do you have proof that you discussed this with the father and he agreed to have her live with you?

What makes this hard is that you put the cart before the horse. You should have filed for a modification before you did not return her to the father. The fact that he did not do anything when you did not return her will help you. Since the child would seem to have established residence in TX I would submit to TX courts.

I'm curious as to how you registered her for school without primary custody.

Thank you for responding. When I registered her in school they asked for her birth certificate and social only. I included her father in all the documents in school as well as provided him with the school info and her teachers name and email. The school never asked who has custody. I have emails from him in regards to her living with me as long as I don't ask for child support or any other government assistance.

Thanks for clarifying. In this day and age, schools should be checking whether a single parent is registering a child and have them show custody. If they had asked you could have taken care of this then.

I would mention it to the school board that they dropped the ball on this. How would you feel if you were the custodial parent and the NCP was able to register your child without your permission? The school needs to tighten up their procedures.

Quote:

Originally Posted by ScottGem

Thanks for clarifying. In this day and age, schools should be checking whether a single parent is registering a child and have them show custody. If they had asked you could have taken care of this then.

I would mention it to the school board that they dropped the ball on this. How would you feel if you were the custodial parent and the NCP was able to register your child without your permission? The school needs to tighten up their procedures.

I completely agree with you. I didn't think much of it then since her father was OK with it but I can definitely see where the lack of procedures can cause serious issues.