I had sex with my sister in law and now she is 6 1/2 months pregnant. Me my wife her and her husband all agreed from day one that me and my wife should have full custody of the child as they want no part in him. So throughout the pregnancy me and my wife have been to all dr appts. And supplied her with food anf pre natal vitamins as well as bought the unborn child everything he will need. About a week ago we all got into an argument and since then she continues to say the baby is another mans which tears me and my wife apart and how I can no longer be on the birth certificate because instead of giving him to us like originally agreed upon she wants to sign him to adoption agency. There has been no paper work done between us since the beginning of the pregnancy. I want to have paternity test done but if I end up not being the father is it possible for me and my wife to still get custody?

Giving him to you? This is a child, not a puppy. Frankly, I'm shocked.

Here's the procedure - wait until the baby is born, have DNA testing done. If he's YOUR child, ask the mother to sign papers allowing you and your wife to LEGALLY ADOPT the child. Then you do just that - adopt the child.

If this is NOT your child you have to right to custody. The parents would surrender the child for adoption and you would attempt to adopt PRIVATELY.

I think you should all keep your pants on in the future.

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Originally Posted by ordieboi

... since then she continues to say the baby is another mans which tears me and my wife apart and how i can no longer be on the birth certificate ...

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Another man's? Not her husband's by any chance? No. That would be too bizarre to contemplate.

Actually, her husband will probably be on the birth certificate. It is presumed that if a woman gives birth while married, that her husband is the father. How did you figure you could just be put on the BC anyway? It's not her option.

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Originally Posted by ordieboi

... instead of giving him to us like originally agreed upon she wants to sign him to adoption agency. there has been no paper work done ...

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As JudyKayTee told you, a baby is not a puppy. You don't just give him away. An adoption would have to be done and that is complex.

She cannot simply "sign him to an adoption agency" without your consent. The agency would probably have to attempt to give you notice. If there is a putative father registry in your state, you want to get on it.

The OP and his wife are torn apart because he had sex with his sister-in-law and now he finds out that the in-law was also having sex with another man.

What a thought - cheaters cheating on the people they are cheating with.

Apparently the realization that the husband and sister-in-law were intimate is not a problem.

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Originally Posted by JudyKayTee

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Apparently the realization that the husband and sister-in-law were intimate is not a problem.

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With apoligies to all those "normal" folks living in Appalachia, it sounds really hillbilly-ish to me.

As noted you most likely will not get custody of the child even if you have a DNA test and you are the father, you will get visitation. When the baby is born you hire an attorney, and file for cusotdy of the child and ask for a DNA test.

As noted, You need to register for your state's Putative Father Registry. This will help prevent her from giving the child up for adoption without your consent.

Otherwise, there is nothing you can do until the child is born.

Also as noted, her husband will be the legal father and will be placed on the birth certificate. As soon as the child is born you need to file for custody.

I would consult with a local Family Law attorney now. You may be able to do something else to preclude her giving the child up for adoption.

Your wife cannot get custody. Once you have obtained custody, she can then adopt the child as a step parent adoption.