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-   -   Did I mess up? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=66480)

  • Feb 26, 2007, 03:08 AM
    dunnowat2do
    Did I mess up?
    So yea I posted earlier and I wanted to ask another question. My post earlier was "is this relationship healthy for me?" I realized that I have rushed into many things pertaining to my relationship. For one I moved in with him way too soon, even though I had known him for years. I am currently locked into a lease with him for a year and the year doesn't runn out until Dec 1, 2007. Now I am at the point where I am questioning things and scaredd that I can't leave because of this lease. He also knows a lot of my personal info and has in the past done bad things to those in which he knows info about. Im scared that if I leave he will run my bank accounts dry and ruin my credit. Is there anything I do do before ending it to prevent anything like identity theft?
  • Feb 26, 2007, 05:34 AM
    Geoffersonairplane
    Yes, speak to the bank. He has no right to interfere with anyone else's financial affairs. That is a matter of confidentiality and I am sure the bank will be understanding about your predicament and will offer a solution. I'm not sure what that might be, it could be putting a freeze temporarily on the bank account before they transfer the accounts to a different account number e.t.c. or something along these lines. They will be able to help you. I would not suggest talking to the boyfriend about your doubt until you speak to your account providers first as he sounds like someone who likes revenge, and unlawful revenge might I add not that any type of revenge is considered lawful or morally right. One problem you have is that you are attached to a 1 year lease and legally speaking, you are responsible for part of the lease. It may not be fair to just walk out and leave him with all the bills. He may need to be compensated in some way if you choose to leave. This is where good, calm and mature communication may come in handy.
  • Feb 26, 2007, 05:56 AM
    talaniman
    Change all your accounts and passwords, and send your mail to a PO box or a safe place. The credit reporting companies can put a freeze on your credit to prevent any new accounts to be opened in your name. As Geoff has said though you will have to be responsible for the rent and bills for a reasonable time, after you have given the proper notice to move.
  • Feb 26, 2007, 06:09 AM
    valinors_sorrow
    I agree with what is posted. I would perhaps consider going a step further. Talk to the bank to take financial precautinos certainly, but I would also talk to a Women's Center or someone who understands being threatened and ask what course you can take to protect yourself. There may be a way to be released from the lease so you can make a clean break of this man. And when you are at last clear of the hazard, please sweetie, learn the lesson about deserving only good men in your life, okay? That is an important one not to miss in the mix here.

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