Well I am writing on here cause its private and I can get the opinions from others I can't get from face to face confrontations. I am 21 years old... I know others have it so much worse than I do but frankley I feel pretty low on the totem pole myself. I have never lost anyone close to me I am getting a good education (one more year to go) I am in excellent health (strong and weight is healthy) I have a great family (two brothers a sister and both my parents), I have many opportunities at my finger tips, but I feel I have no friends (I only have like two peoples numbers on my cell phone who never call) I am pretty ugly Ive never had anyone special in my life, Im balding (people seem to remind me every day), I am one of those guys people look at and make them feel good about themselves because they know they don't look as bad as me, oh yea I have millions of little pot holes on my ugly face... I know Ive brought it on myself all of it,basically I feel low, but I keep it to myself (I mask my feelings well). I would gladly switch places with anyone who is suffering just so they would be comfortable and I would be in the guter where I belong. I don't like feeling the way I do its selfish and greedy I have already made my plan but don't know when to carry it out. They will miss me I know but in a few years they will be fine. I don't cry ever and try to help others out all the time. I would give my life for anyone anytime... I feel like that's why I am here on this earth to just help one person... I am not meant to be helped... once my mission is complete I will be discarded like someone would discard a piece of dog excrement. I am writing this to share with others how I feel something I can't do in daily life.
People will respond to this by saying I should get help, I should turn to religion (I tried but failed like always), I should think of others (I do all the time).
Nothing will change my mind I am here to suffer so someone else can be comfortable, I am fine with this.
Woers me woers me I am not looking for any sympathy.
Thank you for all who read this little tangent. Sorry for wasting your time.

p.s. I've never really chatted on line or shared my feelings like this until I found this site
It's a nice outlet

Let me ask you this... Have you ever felt as though you have made a difference in someone's life?

Take a look at my photo, a real hunk huh? Of course not, looks is not what makes a person, it is how they feel about thierself. For example after I lost my wife some years ago, I started dating, I ended up dating a beauty queen for a while and ended up getting married to a lady 10 years younger who was a college cheer leader. Looks is all in your mind, it affects you because you have convinced yourself it does.

And of course you know what you need to do, get counseling

And get involved in ilfe, do volenteer work, help with charities, go out on the weekend and read to the elderly.

People see you the way you see yourself. (Yes, cliché but true!) So, once you start building your own self-image and your own self-esteem, you'll be amazed at how other people respond to you. There are more than enough posts on this site on how to improve yourself, so look around (Fr_chuck has great suggestions above)

A good way to start seeing the good things in life? : Wake up early one day and see the sun rise, the way birds sing to meet the new dawn, how the grass is literally wet in excitement for the new day! The whole earth greets each day with such pleasure, we should too!

A couple of movie suggestions: "Mask" (1985) and "The Elephant Man" (1980). People whose exterior surface is ugly can sometimes be the most beautiful inside.

You worry me, man. I don't like the sound of this:

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I have already made my plan but don't know when to carry it out. They will miss me I know but in a few years they will be fine.

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Get help before you snap and do damage to yourself or others. You're only as ugly as you think. Think beautifully.

I agree with friar chuck. Looks do not matter. So what if your ugly? In the end it doesn't matter what you look like. If you are just confident in what you do then you are fine. I found that out for myself. Personally I think it is better to be ugly. Yea I know it sounds weird but its what I think. If you are beautiful and everything people want to know you and talk to you based on your looks. Those people tend to be back stabbers and fake. When you are ugly you see people for who they are and can tell the real from the fake ones. So don't be upset that you don't talk to many people (It's like how my mom tells me "in life there is only a handful of people that you can truly call friends"). It just means you have to get out in the world as friar chuck said do community service. Enjoy the time you have been given on this beautiful planet called earth, our membership on it expires fast. :cool:

Wow... that bad huh? That sucks. If you do something now, you'll never know if it would have ever gotten better though. What if?? What if six months from now, something happened wonderful to you? What if... ya year from now you met someone and fell in love because they got to see the inner you? What if... five years from now, you figured out something that you found was truly your life calling? What if? You would never know. Sometimes it's just waiting to find that "What if" that makes it worth the wait. One thing about going through the hard times, it sure as hell makes you appreciate the good times. Keep saying to yourself, "This too shall pass" The only permanent thing is life is change. Things don't stay bad forever nor do they stay good forever. Things change.

You think that people would miss you for a while but they woulld "get over it." No, sorry pal, it doesn't work that way. You've already made it into their lives, and nothing will ever change that. You've already made a difference in the people's lives who love you right now, exactly as you are. Believe me, they can't even imagine you not being in their lives. It would create a hole that could never be filled.

I appreciate these things you all say... but remember there are those out there that need to suffer that's just the way it is... there is always a winner and there is always a loser... I am fine with my plight... oh and ordinaryguy I would never hurt anyone

Actually no, in real life, no one is a lose, we are just all different and it is how we view outself that is the difference

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Originally Posted by michaa

I appreciate these things you all say.....but remember there are those out there that need to suffer thats just the way it is...there is always a winner and there is always a loser...I am fine with my plight...oh and ordinaryguy I would never hurt anyone

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So are you saying that YOU are one of those who needs to suffer and be a loser, or just that SOMEBODY needs to? Although EVERYBODY must suffer sometimes, NOBODY needs to do it perpetually. If you believe that you are born and destined to suffer perpetually and eternally, then I'd have to say that you are already hurting someone--yourself. This is not true, unless you insist on it, in which case you make it so.

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Originally Posted by michaa

Well I am writing on here cause its private and I can get the opinions from others I can't get from face to face confrontations. I am 21 years old... I know others have it so much worse than I do but frankley I feel pretty low on the totem pole myself. I have never lost anyone close to me I am getting a good education (one more year to go) I am in excellent health (strong and weight is healthy) I have a great family (two brothers a sister and both my parents), I have many opportunities at my finger tips, but I feel I have no friends (I only have like two peoples numbers on my cell phone who never call) I am pretty ugly Ive never had anyone special in my life, Im balding (people seem to remind me every day), I am one of those guys people look at and make them feel good about themselves because they know they dont look as bad as me, oh yea I have millions of little pot holes on my ugly face... I know Ive brought it on myself all of it,basically I feel low, but I keep it to myself (I mask my feelings well). I would gladly switch places with anyone who is suffering just so they would be comfortable and I would be in the guter where I belong. I dont like feeling the way I do its selfish and greedy I have already made my plan but dont know when to carry it out. They will miss me I know but in a few years they will be fine. I dont cry ever and try to help others out all the time. I would give my life for anyone anytime...I feel like thats why I am here on this earth to just help one person...I am not meant to be helped...once my mission is complete I will be discarded like someone would discard a piece of dog excrement. I am writing this to share with others how I feel something I can't do in daily life.
People will respond to this by saying I should get help, I should turn to religion (I tried but failed like always), I should think of others (I do all the time).
Nothing will change my mind I am here to suffer so someone else can be comfortable, I am fine with this.
Woers me woers me I am not looking for any sympathy.
Thank you for all who read this little tangent. Sorry for wasting your time.

p.s. I've never really chatted on line or shared my feelings like this until I found this site
Its a nice outlet

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Hi, for a start quit feeling sorry for yourself, I am fifty five years old and have suffered all my life so others can gain from my painful experiences. You are beautiful you know and you know it, it comes from within and I bet if you smile it would radiate the place, it does not matter what you think you look like on the outside, god I am no oil painting and as for friends well I remember crying because I once had no friends. Friends are what happen accidentally, without effort and you are still very young, when you smile people will smile back, we sometimes think we look worse than what other people see us, genuine friends don't see the outer you, then see the inner, the beautiful you and hey guess what, I will be your friend if you want one, so big smile, chin up and please write back and tell me that you feel a little better, take care love and peace anne x

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Originally Posted by michaa

I appreciate these things you all say.....but remember there are those out there that need to suffer thats just the way it is...there is always a winner and there is always a loser...I am fine with my plight...oh and ordinaryguy I would never hurt anyone

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Yes, everybody suffers from time to time but why do you feel it has to be you? And why must you always suffer? You have a lot going for you and a little secret? Many women would take a great personality over looks any day! And not only that but not every woman likes the "tall, dark and handsome" guy. Personally I like a guy with meat on his bones, most people would call them fat, but hey its what I like and there are women like that everywhere. (and I'm not some ugly betty either, most people find me very attractive) Just because you don't look like a model doesn't mean that you are not attractive. Perk up, life's what you make of it. Every moment is an opportunity to change.

I know you say you're a lost cause and you you don't want to hear any comparisments of other people who suffer but get a grip of yourself man.whats really bugging you,you say your ugly,pot holes on your face,no friends and no self respect.your obviously suffering from depression I do ,its nothing to be ashamed of I feel like most days I've 3 kids a fiancé,and a mortgage and for the last 8 months I'm out of work due to a back injury.nobody likes feeling like crap but most people do a lot of the time.weather you like to people or not you know your going to have to.I lost my mother to a brain tumour 12 years ago and miss her every single day and my grandmother and uncle died all in the space of 3 months.you have more than most a loving family a good education and a good home.so my advice would be grow up and stop feeling sorry for yourself,get help and get over it.sorry just how I feel,you have to be cruel to be kind sometimes mate.best of luck.