Ask Me Help Desk - My 3 year old won't talk

My 3 year old son won't talk. He has been attending speech therapy since last May and has not improved. He had ear infections when he was younger and has had his hearing tested with his results perfect. I have read to him since birth, but now he doesn't like to be read to. Also, he has a new sister and seems to have even fewer words since she was born. I thought he would get used to her being in the house, but it has been 5 months now and he still refuses to acknowledge her. He has been assessed by our Early Childhood Special Education department, and they found him to have autistic tendencies. My husband and I do not want him to be diagnosed with autism. I think if he just learns how to talk, his other delays will catch up with him. In other words, I think his social & adaptive delays stem from his language delay. I am desperate to get him to talk to us. Any ideas would be greatly appreciated!

Quote:

Originally Posted by smiths1218

My 3 year old son won't talk. He has been attending speech therapy since last May and has not improved. He had ear infections when he was younger and has had his hearing tested with his results perfect. I have read to him since birth, but now he doesn't like to be read to. Also, he has a new sister and seems to have even fewer words since she was born. I thought he would get used to her being in the house, but it has been 5 months now and he still refuses to acknowledge her. He has been assessed by our Early Childhood Special Education department, and they found him to have autistic tendencies. My husband and I do not want him to be diagnosed with autism. I think if he just learns how to talk, his other delays will catch up with him. In other words, I think his social & adaptive delays stem from his language delay. I am desperate to get him to talk to us. Any ideas would be greatly appreciated!

I have a brother that wouldn't talk. Hes three and all of a sudden he's speaking its not that clear at times (most of the time but you can understand him. Be pateince, keep doing what you r doing and Bre prayerful. Prayer changes things. Also Children learn at a different pace. You can't compare one child to the next. He may grow up and find the cure to aids. Be blessed. You and your baby are in my prayers.
Essence

Essence is completey correct, prayers can do wonders. I will pray. I would suggest reading books and at night play some tapes while your child is sleeping. I agree all children are not the same, they all develop at their own pace.

Do as teaching suggested, also though make sure if he wants something not to just get it for him. Make him tell you what he wants it might be hard but it is something you must do . As long as you just let him point to what he wants then he will feel that it is okay not to speak or even try too.

Quote:

Originally Posted by smiths1218

My 3 year old son won't talk. He has been attending speech therapy since last May and has not improved. He had ear infections when he was younger and has had his hearing tested with his results perfect. I have read to him since birth, but now he doesn't like to be read to. Also, he has a new sister and seems to have even fewer words since she was born. I thought he would get used to her being in the house, but it has been 5 months now and he still refuses to acknowledge her. He has been assessed by our Early Childhood Special Education department, and they found him to have autistic tendencies. My husband and I do not want him to be diagnosed with autism. I think if he just learns how to talk, his other delays will catch up with him. In other words, I think his social & adaptive delays stem from his language delay. I am desperate to get him to talk to us. Any ideas would be greatly appreciated!

Flash cards, picture books, talk to him about everything you do... "Let's put your boots on. These are BOOTS." , "Are you hungry? This is an apple. Can you say APPLE? Apple."
Don't try to force him, don't punish him. My daughter went through this when she was small and now her daughter is showing the same tendencies. I understand your reluctance at having a label placed on your son but sometimes, if the diagnosis turns out to be true, early intervention improves the outcome.
Good luck.

My daughter was diagnosed with Asperger Syndrome--a high functioning form of autism. While it's understandable that you don't like the idea of a label, knowing that your child may have 'different abilities' and that they develop differently than the average child gives you an advantage in knowing and understanding how to help them learn and progress in their abilities.

When a child has a mild form of autism--it does NOT necessarily mean that the child cannot or will not have the ability to learn or to 'act' like other children... in most cases they just learn things differently.

When we found out our daughter was autistic at the age of 3 we worried about her future, I hate to say this--but it was almost as if the docotrs were telling us that she'd never be normal... it scared us and it broke our hearts. We went very pro-active (she was in pre-school, through the school system) and we made sure the school was aware of her needs, they developed a program for her and worked with her in the areas that she needed the most work. I admit--sometimes it was very difficult to work with her--finding new methods to teach her things that most kids would easily catch on to. Also mind boggling because some concepts that most children don't understand until much later--she some how knows and understands...

She is now 10 years old, in fourth grade (we decided to keep her behind this past year because her maturity level, her confidence and her scholastic preformance needed a little boost), she is doing great in school, she attends class with the rest of the kids (no 'special' classes), she can go to her math and reading coaches from previous years if she needs help. The growth that she's shown in the past year alone is remarkable. We know that acknowledging that she is 'different' and allowing her to learn the way she does instead of trying to force her to be 'normal' (whateverthehellnormalis... ) has helped her in becoming the wonderful and unique child that she is.

Don't ignore what they tell you about your son, take the information and use it to help him... the earlier you begin the better off he will be. Good luck, feel free to PM me, I'd be more than happy to be there for you.

Robyn

Quote:

Originally Posted by robynhgl

My daughter was diagnosed with Asperger Syndrome--a high functioning form of autism. While it's understandable that you don't like the idea of a label, knowing that your child may have 'different abilities' and that they develop differently than the average child gives you an advantage in knowing and understanding how to help them learn and progress in their abilities.

When a child has a mild form of autism--it does NOT necessarily mean that the child cannot or will not have the ability to learn or to 'act' like other children....in most cases they just learn things differently.

When we found out our daughter was autistic at the age of 3 we worried about her future, I hate to say this--but it was almost as if the docotrs were telling us that she'd never be normal...it scared us and it broke our hearts. We went very pro-active (she was in pre-school, through the school system) and we made sure the school was aware of her needs, they developed a program for her and worked with her in the areas that she needed the most work. I admit--sometimes it was very difficult to work with her--finding new methods to teach her things that most kids would easily catch on to. Also mind boggling because some concepts that most children don't understand until much later--she some how knows and understands...

She is now 10 years old, in fourth grade (we decided to keep her behind this past year because her maturity level, her confidence and her scholastic preformance needed a little boost), she is doing great in school, she attends class with the rest of the kids (no 'special' classes), she can go to her math and reading coaches from previous years if she needs help. The growth that she's shown in the past year alone is remarkable. We know that acknowledging that she is 'different' and allowing her to learn the way she does instead of trying to force her to be 'normal' (whateverthehellnormalis...) has helped her in becoming the wonderful and unique child that she is.

Don't ignore what they tell you about your son, take the information and use it to help him...the earlier you begin the better off he will be. Good luck, feel free to PM me, I'd be more than happy to be there for ya.

Robyn

Hi,
My son is 3 years and 9 months :cool: now.He has been diagnosted as PPD , a form of autism.I know that it is hard to accept that.But as a parent , I can tell you that he is progressing very well at his own pace.The only thing that worries me is speech,He didi not say a word till 3 & 1/2 , and now his speech is pogressing day after day.
My question is ,Disi your daughter talk early ?
What are the technique that u used with her to cath up the dalays ?
Thanks for grtting back to me .
Nancy:)

My son was born at 33 weeks weighing 3p 2oz he's about to turn 4 next month he just started saying words last February its January 08 and I can understand some words he's says but not a lot just give him time he'll come around or just talk to he's ped doctor.

Quote:

Originally Posted by smiths1218

My 3 year old son won't talk. He has been attending speech therapy since last May and has not improved. He had ear infections when he was younger and has had his hearing tested with his results perfect. I have read to him since birth, but now he doesn't like to be read to. Also, he has a new sister and seems to have even fewer words since she was born. I thought he would get used to her being in the house, but it has been 5 months now and he still refuses to acknowledge her. He has been assessed by our Early Childhood Special Education department, and they found him to have autistic tendencies. My husband and I do not want him to be diagnosed with autism. I think if he just learns how to talk, his other delays will catch up with him. In other words, I think his social & adaptive delays stem from his language delay. I am desperate to get him to talk to us. Any ideas would be greatly appreciated!

My son is also 3 years old and is not talking yet. He use to talk and say all kinds of things until I was pregnant with his sister when he was about 18 months old. And now I can't get him to say anything yet. Me and my husband have done all we could do to get him to talk. We spend lots of time with him, have used pictures and also tried to withdraw certain things that he wants to get him to speak. His hearing has been tested with perfect results. He understands everything I'm telling him. He's very happy, obedient, has very good eye contact, very playful, attentive, polite and friendly. Nothing seems to be wrong, but speech is the only problem. He was diagnosed with autism because of speech. He had speech therapy and nothing worked. His sister is 18 months now and is talking to him, and he's starting to repeat after her with sounds and mumbling. The more she speaks, he begins to speak. The program that my son was in, tried to get him in an autistic class but I said no because I know my child can't learn to speak if he's around children that aren't speaking. Since I realized that he learns from his sister very well, it would be best to bring him around even more normal talking children. So, me and my husband have decided to put him in a good daycare. My cousin has her own daycare where I can watch my children when I want to. I've seen him with other children and he doesn't get upset if I leave or not because all the other children has his attention and he's very playful with them. My cousin said other parents have told her about children that have not talked, but when they got around other children that can talk fluently, the child begins to talk word by word and now doesn't stop talking at all. My son's former educator told me the same thing about one of her students that wasn't talking since kindergarten, but the more he was around other children, he started talking little bit by little bit and within a year he started having conversations. The parents of that child kept up with this educator that I know. She got a call from this child a while ago and surprised her by wishing her happy birthday. She was so shocked to hear him talk so well. I know this will work for my son because he's already learning from his sister. He will begin daycare next week and I will give you the results. I know it hurts to see your child not talk to you but try to bring him around kids that can talk very well and see what happens next.

We'll, I started my son on daycare yesterday. I came in with him for 45 min. and I watched him play with the children so well. He waved hi to all the kids. The last time I saw him wave at anyone was about a few months ago. So, I left him there and I went home. As soon as I pulled up in the driveway, I got a call from the daycare provider. She asked me, "When was the last time you heard your son say mommy?" I told her it had been 19 months basically since his sister was born which was 19 months ago. She said to me, "You would not believe this, but your son just said mommy about 6 times and said dada as well and it brought tears to my eyes." When she said this to me I was stunned and excited. I talked to my son over the phone and she said he was forming his lips to say mommy but wouldn't. I came by to pick him up 3 hours later and he ran to me so excited. I happily congradulated him and took him home. After the kids ate dinner, he came to me and said, "Mom---my, mom--my, mom--my, mommy, mommy!" I started jumping up and down and clapping for him encouraging him to keep saying it. I grabbed my cell phone and taped the whole thing on the camcorder. He also said dada about 10 times and later on we got him to say Jesus! Me and my husband were amazed and talked to the daycare provider. She said that all the other children were constantly talking to him over and over and he just gave in. She began working with him and asked him to say mommy and he did. And he came home saying it all evening and night long. Even when we put the kids to bed at night, he was saying it while he was laying down. The more he's around the kids the better. Most of the kids are around 3 years old and very talkative. I have proof that this is working. And can you believe this was the first day?