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-   -   He thinks he's the father after 5 years? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=66279)

  • Feb 25, 2007, 02:03 PM
    mtimes4
    He thinks he's the father after 5 years?
    Okay this is hard. I found out through a myspace message I happen to see my wife reading that my 5 year old daughter might not be mine. She had a ONE TIME fling with this man and around the same time my wife became pregnant.
    I took a $99 internet DNA test that excluded me as the father but had my wrong race listed on it? So I don't know if it is correct or not (what a blow this has been to me) It said it is heavily based on race also I am mixed so I don't understand how that would work. We have a 7 year old together that and my two daughters look very a like. They also each have alopecia a genetic disease that is from my mother?
    So this man found my wife on myspace and sent a message saying he wants to be a part of my 5 year olds life. He thinks she is his after seeing her picture! We do not want to do another DNA test because is was a very hard thing. We are working on our relationship and she is my daughter regardless. We just want to move on with our lives. My question is what rights does he have? If any? Can he take us to court and force a Test? Thanks
  • Feb 25, 2007, 02:11 PM
    Fr_Chuck
    First does it matter really, if you are the father, want to be the father, so be the father, If you forgive her for the affair, get on with life, who cares??

    If you have to really know, get a real DNA test, you and the child have to both be tested and compaired
  • Feb 25, 2007, 02:16 PM
    tinsign
    First calm down, yes you should most definitely get a paternity test done again, you don't want this man to create any havoc. At least you will be able to establish if it is your biological child or not and if it is he has no claims at all. Be prepared however in case it does turn out he is the child's biological father. Make sure the next test is done by a reputable place where there can be no mistakes. I do hope it turns out you are the father as it seems you have so much love for your children.
  • Feb 25, 2007, 02:25 PM
    mtimes4
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by tinsign
    First calm down, yes you should most definitely get a paternity test done again, you don't want this man to create any havoc. At least you will be able to establish if it is your biological child or not and if it is he has no claims at all. Be prepared however incase it does turn out he is the childs biological father. Make sure the next test is done by a reputable place where there can be no mistakes. I do hope it turns out you are the father as it seems you have so much love for your children.

    My wife does not want to do another DNA test... Can He do anything? Does he have any rights at all. I am afraid this might come up again later in life and I am trying to protect my daughter. This man is Bi-polar so there is no telling what he may do. We in no way want hom to have anything to do with our daughter. Thanks for any info!
  • Feb 25, 2007, 03:27 PM
    ScottGem
    Its not a matter of whether your wants to do the DNA test or not. If this guy wants to force the issue he can. So the bottom line is you have to get a REAL test done and deal with the results. If you are the father, then this guy has no standing. If he is, he can force his parental rights.
  • Feb 26, 2007, 12:24 PM
    tinsign
    I am sorry but yes it is wise to get the paternity test done as it will be required anyway if he is going to lay claim to the child. The sooner you and your wife find out the less stress and emotinal upset you will have. There is only two ways to look at this... 1- you are the father and he will not be able to bother you and wife again or, 2- he is the father and yes will be in the child's life as well as you and your wife's to child is at least 18. Hopefully if he is and doesn't want the responsibility and will sign off parental rights.
  • Feb 26, 2007, 02:16 PM
    mtimes4
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by tinsign
    I am sorry but yes it is wise to get the paternity test done as it will be required anyway if he is going to lay claim to the child. The sooner you and your wife find out the less stress and emotinal upset you will have. There is only two ways to look at this...1- you are the father and he will not be able to bother you and wife again or, 2- he is the father and yes will be in the childs life as well as you and your wifes to child is at least 18. Hopefully if he is and doesn't want the responsibility and will sign off parental rights.

    Well I had messaged him back about a month ago and still have not heard anything back from him. He told my wife 5 years ago he does not want her coming back and claiming he is the father so I don't know what he plans on doing. We don't have the money to get a good DNA test done right now anyway that is why we went the cheap route $99. My daughter looks just like my side of the family and has the same allergies, Thyroid issues and alopecia so I just cannot believe he could be the father. Along with the timing of the pregnancy and other factors. We are just going to continue on with our lives and hopefully he will do the same. If he does force it in the future then we will get it done. It just seems crazy to me that someone can pop up 5 years after a child is born claim he is the father and force a paternity test? Does the law allow that? So I could pick any woman on the street that has a child, claim I am the father, and force them to take a paternity test? Thanks for all the responses.

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