Ask Me Help Desk - How do I ever go on?

I was with a girl for 3 years and I thought she was my soul mate. I loved this girl more then anything or anyone else in my life! She told me that she loved me the same. In fact this girl spent 8 years trying to get me. She and I were married to other people but she wanted me.

Finally after getting divorced from my ex wife and she getting the same from her husband we were together. So for 3 years I was head over heels in love with her. 3 days after Christmas this year she came home from work, and told me she didn't want me anymore. She is now with someone else living with him and pregnant with his child.

My head is still spinning and I want this hurt to go away, but it never does. It's been almost 6 months and I still think about her every minute of every day. How the hell does someone spend all that time trying to get somebody, then after so soon dumps him?

My world is devastated and I will never get anyone else like her. I am so alone and I just don't want to deal with this anymore. I am so alone. I want you back my angel, you promised to never leave. You swore on it. I want you back, please come back to me. How do I ever get over this? Get her back?

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Originally Posted by dillionjohn

It's been almost 6 months and I still think about her every minute of every day. How the hell does someone spend all that time trying to get somebody, then after so soon dumps him? My world is devastated and I will never get anyone else like her. I am so alone and I just don't want to deal with this anymore. I am so alone. I want you back my angel, you promised to never leave. You swore on it. I want you back, please come back to me. How do I ever get over this??

She's not an angel, she's a human being with weaknesses and faults, just like everybody else. Take her down off that pedestal stand and stop idolizing her. You state, “I will never get anyone else like her”…I sure hope not! You deserve better! Start thinking about yourself and how you are going to move on emotionally and mentally. She's gone and you are still there. You deserve to be happy and it's time you started dating again. It's been six months…by the way, is your ex-wife still around and available? Maybe she would take you back, but I don't know if you deserve her. You know, you make your bed and you lie in it. I wonder if you told your ex-wife how sorry you are for abandoning her in the first place because it sure sounds like you made a BIG mistake believing the angel with the broken halo. Take care of you and listen to the voice of reason in your mind because lately your heart has made some very unwise choices, but you are wiser now or at least should have gained some common sense for what you've been through in believing angel with the broken halo. Give your heart time to heal and life is about taking risk so never give up on loving and being loved.

The same way you got over your "ex" and was seeing this girl while you were with your ex.

And to be honest, what did you really expect, she had no trouble chasing or being with you while married to her last husband, so it should be no different with you, the "grass" was greener after she got you, with someone else.

I don't even have to wonder how this happened, just surprised you could not have expected it.

How do you go on, block any contact, don't call, don't look her up on face book, and get out and start new activities, meet new people, and try to find a single person this time, not a married one.

If you believe in such things, it is called Karma.

She ain't coming back, and if she does, you better run like hell, or lock the doors. If your exes can survive and thrive after being lied to and cheated on, so can you.

What a painful lesson to learn the hard way. Do better for yourself.

Three years is going to take a while to heal, six months has obviously not been long enough. Keep living your life, if she comes back reject her, as she does not value you, nor will she. Continue to allow time to pass by and eventually, you will heal from this.

She has no compassion, act like your OK and you don't care. Then later on she will call and you can get both her and him back, same way they did you then tell her to get the **** on

She tried to get you for 8 years while She was married. That should send you red flags right there. Karma is a bxtch.
If she will cheat with you on someone else. Then she will lady cheat on you with someone else. Plain an simple.
The grass is definitely always greener on the other side of the hill. And now that she has climbed that hill and too a picture of that wonderful greener grass. She's onto the next beautiful landscape.
Sorry for all the metaphors.
You seem like a good guy. But you can't expect so much from someone when they aren't even worth any pedestal you put them on. You'll find better. Because you deserve better.