Okay so I'm with this guy and I really really like him but the problem is I get hurt very easily. Sometimes he says stuff with out meaning it and he will have no idea that he hurt me. But I would be in one corner all hurt and sad. I don't know how to stop this. Please help me to not be over sensitive with everything.

The good news is that being over sensitive means you're also sensitive (and loving) in a GOOD way too!

You've taken the first step which is realizing you overreact and you're taking responsibility. That's awesome. Being thoughtful is the first step to add a few links in the chain from "FEEL" to "REACT"... which always gets us in trouble. You're being sensitive because you're afraid to be hurt but unfortunately it can sometimes get in the way of you getting what you really want (which is of course to be loved and understood).

1) Assume that he cares and nothing else! --- most people are not hurting us on PURPOSE or trying to reject/disrespect us. Instead of assuming he's the enemy, think. Are you 100% sure that the action/reaction is meant PERSONALLY to harm you? Probably not. In fact our egos set us up every time to see a "problem" and fight when it's usually not necessary

2) if you overreact -- give yourself a break! Just bounce back, dust yourself off and as soon as you can... take on step #3...

3) Here's that "assume nothing else" part. Instead of going away hurt and withdrawing and assuming lots of things (jumping to conclusions): Talk. Communicate. Ask him what he means and keep talking :) ---**- note that ASK doesn't mean "accuse" or "blame"... (How dare you say that? What the hell do you mean?)... if you act hurt or run off and pout you'll just trigger his defensive mechanisms to distance himself or DEFEND himself - neither of which will make you feel better. But if you talk to him and you're open to learning what he thinks (without assuming it's something BAD) you'll get a lot further.
Relationships are built on communicating.


4) If someone DOES say something hurtful... it's usually coming from a place inside them where they either a) don't mean it or b) are projecting something they don't like about themselves in your direction. In either case... always use your sensitivity to respect yourself and never let anyone be abusive to you.

Start by not taking whatever is said personally, and actually ask him why he said what he says, and what he means. Just speak up for yourself a bit.

You should let him know that you're over sensitive. That is not a bad thing, it makes you who you are. Once you let him know, there is nothing else you can do. I don't recommend changing who you are for another person, it never ends well. Furthermore, I guess it comes to a point in the future if it occurs again, you will have to ask yourself if it is worth it anymore? If it is, then you stick with him, it might cause both of you unhappy though, and if it isn't, you move on.

Girl I am way over sensitive too. I always have been. They gave good advice. Don't change yourself. It is who you are. Be proud but just realize things just as they said. Let people know from the get go. Good Luck :)

I am also too sensitive. And I've been accused and lamed about this from my friends (two friends actually). They force me to change and blame my sensitivity for everything. The bad thing is how to get over this? With this sensitivity I always blame myself (after the fight ends) and they never take responsibility and apologies for their actions but on other hand when you are too sensitive it's hard letting go the friendship we had. But should we change because they want us to change or our friends should just accept us the way we are and in case they can't it's probably time to let them go?