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-   Adoption (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/forumdisplay.php?f=21)
-   -   I feel like a burden to everyone. (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=659229)

  • May 10, 2012, 05:34 PM
    vicki lili-ann
    I feel like a burden to everyone.
    Hi, I am 15 and when I was younger I was molested by my brother. I'm afraid that he just might do it again or even touch me. I don't want to live in the same house as him. I was thinking maybe I would stay with my aunt but they wouldn't agree because I may be a burden to them. Then I was hoping I could stay with my grandmother but she works all day and I wouldn't want her to quit her job because of me. I just don't know what to do. I told my mom and she just ignored it, but if I go and tell someone like a counslor or something then there will be an investigation to put me in foster care. Which I kind of want. I just don't want anyone mad at me because I want to be safe and cared for. I have a very close adult in my life and I know I could stay with her but I don't know how to even come about the conversation or question"can i stay with you?" I don't want to interrupt her life with my problems. What should I do?
    Also, if I was to get taken from my mom would I automatically go with a family member?
  • May 10, 2012, 05:58 PM
    joypulv
    If you feel that one woman is someone you can trust, you should tell her why you want to live with her, not just blurt out the question.
    You need to be prepared to be questioned by police and social workers. When did this happen, how often over what period, and what kind of molestation was it?
    Who the court places with is out of your control, and could be a relative if they come forward and apply to the court.
    Why did you ask this under adoption?
    I think you should tell your mother again with a strong hint of being serious about involving others. If she thinks this was nothing serious, that's one thing to clear up. If she chose to ignore some real description of what happened, then she could be charged with negligence.
    Tell us what happened in a few sentences.
  • May 10, 2012, 08:32 PM
    Fr_Chuck
    Why if you were with Grandma she would have to quit her job, a 15 year old, should be able to completely care for themselves, my 12 year old, does his own laundry, can cook his own meals, cooks for the family at times, and has chores around the house.

    So unless you are helpless why can not you live with someone gone during the day ?

    Next sorry CPS most likely would not take you out of the home, they may investigae and may require brother to take counseling, may require home visits and parenting class for mom.

    It sounds like you figure out why nothing will work without trying it.

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