I am in a newish relationship with a man I met via a dating site 3 months ago. We hit it off straight away, we get on really well, have fun on all our dates, and just recently has started introducing me to his close friends and relatives. He asked me for and exclusive relationship a month or so ago, and things have gone from strength to strength since then.

This last weekend however, we had some very in depth talks about his ex fiancée, he ended the relationship because she refused to make him a priority in his life due to her daughter being around constantly.

He has admitted to me that he still loves her, but also told me that love isn't enough. I have told him that I retain some of my emotions in check, as I am fully aware that whilst he is still in love with her he is unable to love me.. he sobbed nearly the entire night whilst holding me tight. Then left for work giving me the most amazing kisses and hugs. He kept telling me that he had to sort it out, that there was nothing wrong between us, as I had even volunteered to back off for a while, until he sorted everything out in his own mind. He turned me down flat, this he tells me isn't what he wants at all.

I don't know where to go with this, whether to sit tight hoping that these feelings will subside, or whether to leave things where they are and move on?

His ex is still texting him morning and night, normally it is just a quick nightie night text, or an upbeat good morning have a good day etc... he always replies as he has told me he doesn't want to hurt her any more, he has also told me that she has more or less said to him, that when he's had his "little tantrum" over her putting her daughter (aged 25) first, he will be back! He has said categorically that he will never go back to that way of life. As things were dreadful... (We're not just talking about her living there, they had no social life without her in tow, no sex life as she used to interrupt or just walk in, and mass tantrums from her if she didn't get her own way).

She is still on his Facebook profile, and I know she knows nothing about me or our relationship, she asked him over for dinner this weekend, but he declined as he said he chose to come over to me for the weekend, and we went down to see my parents so I could introduce him, which went really well.

So what to do? I care a lot about this man, and he ticks all my boxes apart from this one! :'(

Talaniman Rule _ Never get involved with any one who has an ex active in there life.

Talaniman Rule - Never give your heart to a stranger that doesn't know what to do with it, nor has proved he derserves it!

Sorry, but he ain't ready. And he is a stranger, attractive with potential, but he has a lot of baggage to unpack. You seem to be a rebound/replacement for an ex he still is in contact with. As long as he is, he will never heal, and be a healthy partner for any one.

He will never give 100% to the current relationship and am sure you will never like that to happen. So girl... tell him to go clear his head and then come back to you... in the meantime you go n try doing your own good stuff that is still pending.. ;)

Thanks both... I suppose I knew this deep down just needed it confirming, he has been in contact today, beggars belief really acting as if nothing has happened! I am going over to morrow evening, will deliver the sad news to him then. I really appreciate your replies xx

If he is still hung up over the ex, then just leave.