Ask Me Help Desk - Did I do something wrong?

Did I do something wrong?

Fadeaways are really sad... this guy I was "dating" with because it all turned into "hanging out" it was only 1 month, pffff... I was visiting him at his house, we didn't go anywhere, all the time his place, it was his birthday and I decided to do something small for him and "special", so I came to him with a piece of cake, a candle on and when he opened the door I said: HAPPY BIRTHDAY! Then I said: blow the candle out, ask for a wish and eat it! And the stupid ate it and said at the end: how much did it cost you? 5 cents? I sad: NO! That wasn't the price! Then he said again: 1 dollar? Pffff wow! I thought it was like a little detail and the stupid said that... men are really stupid. I like men of course but believe me, they don't see the way they hurt even in small things like that.

Then I saw him again for the last time and we had a good time, no sex, to me he didn't deserve it yet, at the end when I said good bye just told him: you talk to me then? But it was like and expression we use in my country, maybe he felt pressure for that? Or HE WASN'T INTO ME?

Men want perfect women and they are not. All this dating stuff is ridiculous.

My advice is don't hang out with jerks. Belittling your cake gift, no matter how bad it may have tasted, is out of bounds. Who cares whether he is into you or not. He's a jerk.

I wouldn't feel comfortable with a woman hanging around my place unless we had a committed relationship. You get that from mutual respect earned by dating, talking, and basically participating in a variety of social situations so you know the guy shares your values and interests.

What men want is not usually what they need.

If I understand it right, you were with him for a month or less. That is just getting to know them and not even time to build a relationship. It is when you date, may be dating a few people and decide who to stop dating when it is not working out.

I don't see that ALL men want perfect women. In fact, I don't see how that thinking even enters into this.

Anyway, was he expecting you or did you just drop in with a piece of cake?

Maybe he's not that into you; maybe he's not into anybody right now. Impossible to know but you were hardly in a long-term committed relationship.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chic_Bowdrie

My advice is don't hang out with jerks. Belittling your cake gift, no matter how bad it may have tasted, is out of bounds. Who cares whether he is into you or not. He's a jerk.

I wouldn't feel comfortable with a woman hanging around my place unless we had a committed relationship. You get that from mutual respect earned by dating, talking, and basically participating in a variety of social situations so you know the guy shares your values and interests.

What men want is not usually what they need.

Ok, thanks a lot for your advice, and you are so right, he's a jerk.
I never understood why he said he wanted to see me that last day anyway,
If he wasn't interested, I just felt that.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck

If I understand it right, you were with him for a month or less. That is just getting to know them and not even time to build a relationship. It is when you date, may be dating a few people and decide who to stop dating when it is not working out.

Yes, you're so right, maybe it was my fault too, I imagined too much to be honest, but next time I will not date someone who is 2 yrs. Younger than me, I like mature men, but I have in my head I have to find someone and it killed everything for sure.

Thanks.

Quote:

Originally Posted by JudyKayTee

I don't see that ALL men want perfect women. In fact, I don't see how that thinking even enters into this.

Anyway, was he expecting you or did you just drop in with a piece of cake?

Maybe he's not that into you; maybe he's not into anybody right now. Impossible to know but you were hardly in a long-term committed relationship.

Well, maybe I didn't mention many other things that happened with this guy and I just wrote it.

Well, he called me and we'd set up a date.

Yes, maybe he's not ready for anything right now, but I feel bad anyway for trying to make someone "happy" with my presence.