I am very confused , and need to know the law in Connecticut concerning my daughter. She is now 13.5 yrs old. When she was born her father and I lived together and he is on her birth certificate. When she was6 yrs old I left him and after staying with friends for a while I moved in with man I currently reside with. When this happened he did not see her for a few months, I would try to call to see if he wanted to see her but the conversation would turn back to the fact that I left.Finally 6 months later he was civil enough for me to leave her with him for a few hours and came and got her. It has since turned into he picks her up every weekend (on Sat.and returns her Sun evening, he usually has her every holiday, because I wanted her to now her family, her nana, aunt, cousins, on his sideand also because we live in the same town again. I am telling you all this so you know the whole scenario. He does pay child support but it is not ordered. I say 'reside' because we recently broke up a few months go, although it has been a few years happening and now I want to move. The thing is I want to move 2.5 hrs away in another state(New Hampshire) with someone I have known since I was a toddler actually. We have remained friends throughout the years and he offered me and my daughter a place to stay free of charge. I think the change will be good for my daughter and myself. My question is, since my daughters father and I were never married, and there is no 'official custody order in place can I leave the state with her, or will I be arrested for kidnapping? I certainly don't want that! Should I apply for custody, and if I do can her father refuse to let me move more than fifty miles away? Please help, thank you in advance

IF you try to move ( or move) the father can do an emergancy order to force you to return or to turn over custody of child to him. What plans have you made for him to visit, will you pay for the added cost of the transport of the child?

If there is no Court Order regarding custody and/or visitation YOU have total control and YOU can move. The father can attempt to stop you from moving because he will lose touch with his daughter.

He also doesn't have to pay support right now - which you know - and I'm sure he'll stop that, just out of human emotion.

What would I do? I'd go to Court and get visitation/custody and support Court Ordered.

Save yourself a problem if/when you move and he decides he wants you to move back - or wants her to move back.

My other concern is what happens if he gets wind of your plans and HE decides not to return her after a weekend? You would have a battle on your hands.

I'd consult with an Attorney in your area.

I don't like the legal threads to turn into chat rooms BUT you have explained the problem very well - and that almost NEVER happens! It sure makes things easier.