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Pressed charges on boyfriend

Hi in January me and my boyfriend had an argument in an shopping center and he pushed me over and he got arrested and I got took home, since then he's been on bail not to be with me because I pressed charges cause my family wanted me to since then I've been trying drop charges it got to late, two witnesses from an body shop gave an statement what they saw in January but don't want attend court, so the police want make me go now and give evidence and not long ago I made the police come out to me to get an retraction statement why I don't want attend and they said they looking on discontinuing it anyway, I just want know if I do have go court will I have to give evidence? And today I got caught with my boyfriend my an under cover police and he got arrested and now he got attend court Monday, I just want know if he will get put on remand till the court date April 23rd?xx

This sounds a petty domestic, you don't have to go to court to give evidence. Is this his first offence? He will get a slap on the wrist. He didn't harm you, he pushd you over. And he won't get put on remand Monday, the court case will probably be droppd as its all over you pressing charges on sum one who pushd you over. The court aren't going to want to waste loads of money dealing with this petty crime seeing as your both together again now. The case will probably get droppd Monday

Well it over over that he pushed me over, we had an argument in an shopping center and the police took me home, and cause he's been in trouble with the police loads of time before they don't like him. They told me they want me press charges so I did and they put in the statement he kicked me and that but he's been to court about it already and they can't see nothing on the CCTV footage, and two witnesses don't want attend to give evidence, so they want me to give evidence and if I don't they will get an warren out to my arrest, but I said I am remaining silence in court anyway, and we got go court 23rd April, that when they said I have got to go, xx

Quote:

Originally Posted by d.ronn

this sounds a petty domestic, you dont have to go to court to give evidence. is this his first offence? he will get a slap on the wrist. he didnt harm you, he pushd you over. and he wont get put on remand monday, the court case will probly be droppd as its all over you pressing charges on sum one who pushd you over. the court arent going to want to waste loads of money dealing with this petty crime seeing as your both together again now. the case will probly get droppd monday

well it over over that he pushed me over, we had an argument in an shopping center and the police took me home, and cause he's been in trouble with the police loads of time before they don't like him. They told me they want me press charges so I did and they put in the statement he kicked me and that but he's been to court about it already and they can't see nothing on the CCTV footage, and two witnesses don't want attend to give evidence, so they want me to give evidence and if I don't they will get an warren out to my arrest, but I said I am remaining silence in court anyway, and we got go court 23rd April, that when they said I have got to go, xx

I guess telling you to stay away from him and leave him won't be listened to. This is how it starts in domestic abuse. As a police officer I have seen it over and over.
They beat you and you want them arrested, then the next day will spend all the money you have to bail them out.

They may arrest you for contempt of court if you don't testify.

Of course the next time he will beat you harder, But that is OK , you will learn to live with it, even come to expect it. He will blame you and you will accept the beatings as your fault.

Quote:

Originally Posted by d.ronn

this sounds a petty domestic, you dont have to go to court to give evidence. is this his first offence? he will get a slap on the wrist. he didnt harm you, he pushd you over. and he wont get put on remand monday, the court case will probly be droppd as its all over you pressing charges on sum one who pushd you over. the court arent going to want to waste loads of money dealing with this petty crime seeing as your both together again now. the case will probly get droppd monday

Please post your reference on this - she DOES have to go to Court and she can be FORCED to go to Court.

He put his hands on her. That's assault and that's abuse. Those are criminal acts.

All he did was push her over? You can't be serious!

She doesn't get to decide whether the case moves forward. She can withdraw, refuse to testify and anything in between and it can and possibly will go forward.

The mindset of the OP is beyond my comprehension but...

At any rate your legal advice is straight out, dead wrong and you do a disservice to every man and woman whose "partner" EVER laid a hand on him or her. It's not an "only" situation.

Quote:

Originally Posted by d.ronn

he didnt harm you, he pushd you over. and he wont get put on remand monday, the court case will probly be droppd as its all over you pressing charges on sum one who pushd you over. the court arent going to want to waste loads of money dealing with this petty crime

That's just plain stupid. He pushed her over and that's OK. Next time when he hits her, that will be OK too. Then when he kicks her in the head, that will also be OK. Absolute stupid answer. None of this is ever OK and to suggest that it is, plain STUPID.

To the OP... why are you back with him? You should be testifying against him and leaving him. If he did it once, he's 99% sure to do it again but worse this time around. Things aren't going to get any better with this tough guy who thinks that abusing women is OK.

Quote:

Originally Posted by odinn7

That's just plain stupid. He pushed her over and that's ok. Next time when he hits her, that will be ok too. Then when he kicks her in the head, that will also be ok. Absolute stupid answer. None of this is ever ok and to suggest that it is, plain STUPID.

To the OP...why are you back with him? You should be testifying against him and leaving him. If he did it once, he's 99% sure to do it again but worse this time around. Things aren't going to get any better with this tough guy who thinks that abusing women is ok.

he didn't kick me or hit me we were arguing in an shopping centre and I told him it was over so he got pissed of and pushed me and wouldn't leave when the people told him to, so he got arrested and my got pressured into pressing charges since then I haven't want it continued

Quote:

Originally Posted by leahlovesneal

he didn't kick me or hit me we was arguing in an shopping centre and i told him it was over so he got pissed of and pushed me and wouldnt leave when the people told him to, so he got arrested and my got pressured into pressing charges since then i havnt want it continued

I have no idea what some of this says BUT I'm reading that you got into an argument in public (I have no idea if he pushes you in public how he treats you in private - public behavior is usually good behavior). "He didn't kick or hit [you]" so I'm guessing you think pushing you is acceptable.

You got pressured into pressing charges - who pressured you and the Police didn't need you to press charges - and now you want to drop the charges so that he can abuse you again.

You think as long as he didn't hit or kick you his behavior is acceptable.

Do I have it right?

You are aware that if you retract your statement you've submitted a false Police Report, right? Then he'll be out of jail and you'll be in jail.

How old are the two of you - or did you post that and I missed it?

I'm surprised a member of your family hasn't explained to him how to treat a woman. For that matter, why do you have such a low opinion of yourself that you not only allow his behavior but are attempting to explain it away?

Quote:

Originally Posted by leahlovesneal

he didn't kick me or hit me we was arguing in an shopping centre and i told him it was over so he got pissed of and pushed me and wouldnt leave when the people told him to, so he got arrested and my got pressured into pressing charges since then i havnt want it continued

I didn't say he hit or kicked you... I said when he gets to doing that, I guess that will be OK as well.

My sister went through this. Ask her how it felt when the abuse went from pushing/slapping to eventually smashing her head off the toilet... and breaking the toilet.

It was partly my fault that he pushed me over in the first place he would never mean to hurt me, and well I got took home& my parents wanted me press charges against him so I did, after that I have regretted him since cause I want be with him and we still together now. And two witnesses from an body shop gave an statement all they put in it was they heard screaming& they don't want attend court on April 23rd so the police saying they want me to go, but I am confused cause about 4 weeks they come out and took an retraction statement of me to ask me why I don't want attend court, and they said they were looking on discontinuing it, so I am not sure what's happening, but all I care about now is that he's in cells now because he got caught with me yesterday and he got go court tomorrow morning, and I worried that they won't let him go tomorrow they might keep him in cells till court date;/

And so if I say what the police put in the statement is not true what will happen? I am not aloud to retract my statement because I am 16 and I didn't go with any older enough so it got to late, but I made a retractment statement explaining why I didn't want attend court( I basically put cause I don't want it continued and it wasn't a serious thing& all that happened was he pushed me& then the police said they looking on discontinuing it. I just want some advice that's itx

First "you" don't press charges, the police and/or the DA press the charges from the evidence and the statements given to them. You merely told them what happened and he was charged with the crimes he did.

It does not matter that you want to retract your statement or that you don't want to testify. They can hold court and try to convict him anyway, They will use the 911 call, the statements of other witnesses and more.

It is great it was arrested again, since it proves to the court he has no respect of their court orders, he was ordered on bail not to be around you. And of course if you don't show up in court and testify , they can charge you with contempt of court, They do that a lot now, since abuse of girlfriends is such a problem, and the girlfriends like you, start to take the blame of abuse, and accept it, so they have to get extra tough to try and stop it.

All I want to know is if I say that my statement in not true what will happen?

You will be charged with making a false statement and arrested.

Hmm well he's been to court a couple of times about it all ready and before that I was going to the police trying to retract or change my statement and drop charges but I couldn't cause I am 16 and didn't go with an adult so it got to late, recently they been saying they are discontinuing it cause there not enough evidence, apart from my statement& they want me go court and get an warren out for my arrest but I have made the retraction statement so now I am confused. And are you a police officer or just a person answering my question?

Quote:

Originally Posted by leahlovesneal

...i just want know if i do have go court will i have to give evidence? ...

If you are subpoened, or if you happen to be in the courtroom when they call you to testify, and if you refuse to answer, yes, you can be held in contempt of court.

Quote:

Originally Posted by leahlovesneal

... and today i got caught with my bf ... and he got arrested and now he got attend court Monday, i just want know if he will get put on remand till the court date April 23rd?xx

Don't know. Don't care.

Quote:

Originally Posted by leahlovesneal

and so if i say what the police put in the statement is not true what will happen?? i am not aloud to retract my statement because i am 16 and i didn't go with any older enough so it got to late, but i made a retractment statement explaining why i didn't want attend court( i basically put cause i don't want it continued and it wasn't a serious thing& all that happened was he pushed me& then the police said they looking on discontinuing it. i just want some advice thats itx

Are you reading any of the answers... or are you just planning to continue to post and explain why your boyfriend pushed you and why it's okay?

If you retract your statement you are saying you LIED when you first made the report. That's filing a false Police Report. Then YOU get to be charged with that crime and he gets to walk away.

I believe I already said that once.

Quote:

Originally Posted by leahlovesneal

all i want to know is if i say that my statement in not true what will happen?

Are you reading ANY of the answers? I covered this several posts ago.

Of course, jail for you may not be a bad thing. It will get you away from him.

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