Military Cargo Plane
A military cargo plane, flying over a populated area, suddenly loses power and starts to nose down. The pilot tries to pull up, but with all their cargo, the plane is too heavy. So he yells to the soldiers in back to throw things out to make the plane lighter. They throw out a pistol. "Throw out more!" shouts the pilot. So they throw out a rifle. "More!" he cries again. They heave out a missile, and the pilot regains control.
He pulls out of the dive and lands safely at an airport. They get into a jeep and drive off. Pretty soon they meet a boy on the side of the road who's crying. They ask him why he's crying and he says "A pistol hit me on the head!"
They drive more and meet another boy who's crying even harder. Again they ask why and the boy says, "A rifle hit me on the head!"
They apologize and keep driving. They meet a boy on the sidewalk who's laughing hysterically. They ask him, "Kid, what's so funny?" The boy replies, "I sneezed and a house blew up!"
Cat Gets Killed
A little boy is gone to school one day and while he is gone, his cat gets killed. His mother is very concerned about how he will take the news.
Upon his arrival home, she explains the tragedy and tries to console the boy saying, "But don't worry, the cat is in Heaven with God now."
The boy replied, "What's God gonna do with a dead cat?"
Better Living Through Chemistry
Table of Elements:
C = carbon
Ho = holmium
Co = cobalt
La = lanthanum
Te = tellurium
CHoCoLaTe - Better living through chemistry!
Ladies do not try this at home!!!!
