Please somebody read this and help me. My husband I and have been married over 5 years have 2 incredible babies and have great sex when we find time to enjoy each other. A few weeks ago we took a break. We had been fighting so much over little stuff. Not only had we both been laid off from our jobs but we had a new baby and his father passed from cancer he hat been fighting for years. When we got back together I saw he googled images of Jacobs ladder piercings. We never have sex in the back door neither of us like it. Hesays he doesn't mindgay guys as long as they don't hit on hit on him. Am I over exaggerating? Or could my husbandd be questioning his sexual preferences? He told me when I asked him about this that he was thinking of getting the piercing which I knew was a lie he then told me he wad comparing his size to other men but then why not Google penis or something else? Please someone read and help me

Maybe he just wanted to try something new to add a little more excitement to your love life I wouldn't be so set on it are there other changes that you've noticed or just this. How do you know for sure that he wasn't thinking of getiing the piercings? Not to say you don't know your own husband please don't take it that way also maybe he was just currious about what it looked like

How old is your husband if you don't mind me asking

He is in his early 20s. His attitude has changed some. I took it up to everything going on in our lives. I know he wasn't thinking about getting for one because he wouldn't show himself to anyone in order to get it. My husband has always loved porn and has a ton of porn. I have never seen gay porn in the history browser but that doesn't mean he wouldn't have deleted it right? He also has a lot of downloaded girl images could that just be a cover? All of this is just so very confusing and.stressful. And he is the type of person that would take a secret to the grave but I believe I deserve to be happy with a man that wants me. Oh also, back when we first started dating he told me that he loved Marilyn Manson and that he would do him he wouldn't let Marilyn do him but that he would be on the receiving side.

Oh and by the way thank you very much for taking time to read and answer my question. I don't feel comfortable asking anyone from my family or friends. I don't want anyone to judge him. I wouldn't judge him because I have been with girls before we were married and have had lots of gay friends. I just don't want to be married to someone who deep down wants to be with someone else. It doesn't matter to me anyway if its male or renale.

I agree about the male and female Part it doesn't matter cheating is cheating. My advice would be to get back to somewhat the same routine like it was when you first fell in love with each other . That would be... changing your focus back to him like it was when u first got together he was probably the center of your focus and everything else just faded into the background I understand that with children its not that simple to do but find new and different ways to show him and tell him you love him don't just let it slip away . Grab onto what you want and don't let go fight for him with all that you have. In doing this I believe that he in turn will begin to bring back the ways in which he loved you first just because he may have something that seems to be shiny and glittery in the perafrial view starting to catch his eye doesn't mean it will be what he wants you know the old saying the grass is always greener on the other side. I feel like if you both let go sortly afterwards you would both regret it . People are letting go way to easy these days and are regretting it when its far to late to undo what was done sorry if I got carried away with that. Also I know the feeling of not wanting to share things with friends and family because they do judge sometimes harder than the outsider would

Everything you said is so helpful. It is so hard to talk to family and friends not just the fear of being judged but also they always day the same things that don't help. We have truly fought for each other and been through just about it all.

Infidelity bankrupty having to turn to the government to help buy our children food. I feel like we have beat so much and gotten through it and now I almost feel like he could be hiding a secret from me and that hurts. I want to feel like your can trust me no matter what even with something is afraid to maybe even admit to himself. If there is a possibility that he could be bi sexual or even gay if I do everything in my power to make him love me all over again will it truly change? Won't he always feel like something is missing and he needs something more in his life?

I don't believe so I feel like you can't miss something you never had . I would try to work at it because even if it were to end up going south at least you could walk away with a clean (cociouns spell check) knowing deep down inside that you tried whole heartedly and you would have no regrets as far as that goes. Money problems is one of the biggest reasons people walk away from a marriage but if you think about it walking away costs lots more than standing and sometimes that's all a person has th strength to do is just stand and weather the storm remember this too shall pass. My daddy always says it will all come out in the wash baby girl. Don't give up perservere fight for what's yours don't let it slip away. If this is the man you want to be with don't let go if it's a healthy relationship as far as non abusive and drug free then most everything else can be worked through in my opinion I have heard older couples speak that have been together yrs and more say that the one partner cheated and they stayed and are so glad they did . I guess all I am really saying is just stand when that's all you can do. If it bothers you wait for the right time to approach him about it again until yyou can be satisfied and lay these thoughts to rest . You know your husband you know when that time is sometimes I create the opportunity by pouring my heart out about something that relates to what I'm trying to get through to my husband to talk about and then I'll slowly start asking questions about it until I get him to start talking about something that I know deep down is on his mind but he refuses to speak about I had a similar situation not long ago but it was about past not preasent things and I used our down time our time away from the kids to lure him into talking about it after it was all said and done I felt more at ease because now things didn't have to be hidden any longee they were in the open

That is 50 yrs and more

Thank you so much for the support. I have read over sites like this and never had the courage to put any of my own questions out there.. thinking to myself no one is going to take time to try to help me. It makes the days a little brighter knowing that there are people out there whiling to help a complete stranger. Pay it forward, I have always believed in that and I hope that I can help someone and make them feel more at ease because you have really helped. Sometimes it helps to just get it off your chest and hear words of encouragement. Thank you very much and I hope you truly understand how much it has helped just to be able to talk about this. Bc I do want to grow old with him and raise our family together. It may take time to just get over the feeling of he's hiding something but your dad was right all will come out in the wash.. thank you!

Thank you so much for the support. I have read over sites like this and never had the courage to put any of my own questions out there.. thinking to myself no one is going to take time to try to help me. It makes the days a little brighter knowing that there are people out there whiling to help a complete stranger. Pay it forward, I have always believed in that and I hope that I can help someone and make them feel more at ease because you have really helped. Sometimes it helps to just get it off your chest and hear words of encouragement. Thank you very much and I hope you truly understand how much it has helped just to be able to talk about this. Bc I do want to grow old with him and raise our family together. It may take time to just get over the feeling of he's hiding something but your dad was right all will come out in the wash.. thank you!

Your very welcome I am glad that my advise gave you comfort I was just really able to relate to your situation and I do feel very passionate about marriage and about couples being able to survive in this hateful world we live in today where everyone is ready to throw in the towel and call it quits . I was divorced it was not by my choosing but I am glad to know that I did try everything to make it work. I am happy with the way my life is now though I have a wonderful husband who stands by my side I wouldn't trade him for anything . I hope and pray that things work out for the very best for you and yours

I think you need to just ask hin. Tell him what you're concerned about - the pornography habit, the distance between the two of you, his comnents about Marilyn Manson. Let him know you're worried about the marriage and you need him to be truthful with you. You have to avoid being judgmental or he won't open up to you.

The pornography and your young ages with two children are both concerning to me - not the best things for a healthy and stable marriage. You have to work at any marriage to work, and can't be guessing what's on his mind - you need to ask and make it possible for him to be honest with you. I have no idea what a Jacobs Laddar tattoo is - whether that reflects on sexal preference or not is lost on me.