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-   -   I don't know if I should break up with him? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=635988)

  • Feb 14, 2012, 12:21 PM
    sanguinexlb
    I don't know if I should break up with him?
    There are so many pros and cons to both sides...

    He's very very moody, and dislikes being around people to the point that he spends the majority of his day (outside of class) sitting in his dorm room, on the Internet or playing video games (which is fine... in moderation). We've been dating for a little over two years now, and when we first came to college we shared the same friend group, but now he spends the majority of his time alone. Even the guys who he used to be better friends with never go any visit him or ask him to do anything because he's always complaining about being tired or he's being moody and depressing and rather negative again. He has made absolutely no friends of his own since we came to college, so when he wants to go eat lunch and doesn't want to be alone I have to go with him instead of going to eat with my friends and meeting new people. He doesn't talk to me when we are together, and if there is any conversation it is started by me. He won't go out to public places because there's always somebody out there that is going to annoy him. And he complains about the fact that I'm the only one who will ever go visit him in his dorm room...

    But, at the same time, I don't remember what it's like to not be with him. I know that he will make a wonderful husband if we actually do get married once school is all finished up... but that's still very far away. And being with him is preventing me from searching out study abroad opportunities that I need for my college courses.

    Should I just break up with him at this point?
  • Feb 14, 2012, 01:33 PM
    country_girl86
    How would he make a wonderful husband if he isn't making a good boyfriend after only 2 years?? That part is disturbing.

    It sounds like he isn't happy and of course it is affecting you. You are only in college. Life is too short to be living it like this. That being said, it is essentially your decision, and your decision alone, to whether you break up or stick with it.

    You said "But, at the same time, I don't remember what it's like to not be with him." This scares me a lot because it sounds like the ONLY real reason you want to stay with him is because you are afraid of the unknown/or being alone. But based on personal experience, I promise you, your life will go on with or without him. And without him it may be great or even better than you can even imagine, especially now in your current situation.

    Never sell yourself short. Emotions can take over. But your gut instinct is the bet. I wish you luck in your decision. And remember, YOU deserve to be happy.
  • Feb 14, 2012, 01:39 PM
    Wondergirl
    What part of this relationship is making you happy and improving your life?
  • Feb 15, 2012, 09:17 AM
    I wish
    Don't settle for less than you deserve. Sounds to me that these are things about him that may never change or it will take a long time to change.

    The question is whether you can accept him the way he is?

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