I love him a lot but he is very jealous and doesn't like me wearing short skirts or shorts he doesn't trust me at all. I know that he loves me but I can't be in a relation where my feelings my happiness doesn't matter. Whenever I talk to him about this he says that he cares for me, that's why he is like this.

We are in a relation from the last one and a half year and in this time he has hurt himself many times just because I don't do things which he expect. And I am afraid that if I will break up with him he will do these things again and will hurt himself

Tell me what should I do.

Get rid of this emotional manipulator. This is not a healthy, nor is it love. A year and a half is far to long to put up with this BS.

Agreed! With mr Tala

I mean.. wow! I would rather be alone than with someone and this emotinaly distressed!

This guy is no good!
And you need to leave this relationship fast!
If you heard that one of your friends was going through this you would say the same thing as us
You would not say oh stick it out it will get better

Because it will not.



Tell him to grow up stop acting like a kid
And this is not an adult relationship
Its more like a high school relationship


All the best

You really should leave the relationship. I'm not in the habit of telling what people should do with their lives because people control their own destinies but for once in these kind of situations it would be best for you to leave. I would really hate to see you get into the same situation that I did.

The guy sounds like he has "borderline personality disorder", which is not uncommon for men with abusive and controlling issues. People who are borderline constantly hurt themselves... not for attention, but because of their emotional instability. People who suffer from this personality disorder are abusive and have outbursts like a child. Reasons for which they were abused when they were children.

If he exhibits extreme behaviour after you leave... like stalking, threats and tries to hurt you in any way shape or form... go to the police. They will help provide the support you need. Do not return to him. Someone who loves you does not abuse you or control you or have jealousy issues. Seek out help from a women's resource centre so you are not a victim of a controlling man or any form of abuse again. YOu need to heal from this relationship and rediscover who you are and realize the signs of the protocol of the abusive male. For example:
1. Jealousy issues
2. Possessiveness
3. Belittling you (that includes name calling: like telling you "your stupid"; "you are worthless";
"your a b**ch"
4. Following you
5. Rough sex or forcing you into sexual things that make you uncomfortable or rape.
6. Needing to know who you are talking to on the phone etc...

I think you get a pretty good picture from the list I have provided. A counsellor from a women's resource centre will help you to recognize the patterns and provide assertiveness training as well as helping you to be ready in the dating world.

My thoughts go out to you. Take care of yourself!