Hi, I've been dating this girl for almost half a year now. Everything is going great. The only thing is that she has a trust issue. Many of her girlfriends or other wmen that she knows were either cheated by their boyfriends or were divorced by their husand(it's the husband fault)after many years of happy marriage. So she automatically thinks that I'm one of those "guys" also, but I'm really not. How do I convince my girlfriend that I'm not like one of those "guys". It's like whatever I say, she doesn't really believe me or she'll say she believes my for now. I have been having lots of trouble with this and really need help! Thanks in advance.

After time and good actions on your part she may come around and just be yourself and not harp on it. It takes time to get over her issues.

I am one girl with many issues, I have talked about them many times on this site, and what I have learned is it takes everybody their own amount of time to get over things, it helps when you know you are really loved, you feel like you can be yourself and start to let things go, I have been done wrong by many people who I thought I could trust and some were many years ago but I am still dealing with trust issues now, if you are one of those great people that she really can trust she eventually will, also, she might trust you already but says those thngs to make her self believe she doesn't so she won't get hurt if she is right in her assumptions. It's a lose lose situation on both parts, because you will eventually get you will get tired of the no trust and leave or she will be messing her own mind up by thinking these negative thoughts. Either way it will be hard for both of you.

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Originally Posted by hjiang27

Hi, I've been dating this girl for almost half a year now. Everything is going great. The only thing is that she has a trust issue. Many of her girlfriends or other wmen that she knows were either cheated by their boyfriends or were divorced by their husand(it's the husband fault)after many years of happy marriage. So she automatically thinks that I'm one of those "guys" also, but I'm really not. How do I convince my girlfriend that I'm not like one of those "guys". It's like whatever I say, she doesn't really belive me or she'll say she believes my for now. I have been having lots of trouble with this and really need help! Thanks in advance.

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Just show her how much she means to you.. MAybe she feels like you don't have room for her!. Don't get hyper about it because it will just make things worse.. Sit down and talk to her and explain... Thats what I would do!

If you have done nothing to cause the lack of trust then don't worry about it too much. Just keep telling and showing her how much she means to you. She will eventually come around and see that she can trust you. She is being influenced by other people's bad relationships and is scared that hers will turn out the same. Just hold your head up and be yourself.

You can't be with someone who doesn't trust you. Trust is the foundation. If she's having issues believing that you won't do that to her. That her mistrust is making you feel bad or whatever. Tell that straight to her face. Don't beat around the bush, because if you do then bottling things up inside is worse than cheating because eventually you could end up hurting her even more.

I'd have to say I agree with everyone and if you like her that it may just take time. But if this is a constant ongoing issue she continues to bring up then I agree with Serenitynow that you just have to flat out say "I'm my own person and I'm not to be judged based on what other guys did to you or your friends. If you can't trust men just because their men maybe you shouldn't be dating."

Furthermore let's be honest here she is heariing about the guys from her girlfriends. There opinions are skewed in there favor. The guys she keeps referencing probably have different opinions about who used who.