Ask Me Help Desk

Ask Me Help Desk (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/forum.php)
-   Relationships (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/forumdisplay.php?f=277)
-   -   Should I respond? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=632024)

  • Jan 31, 2012, 06:54 AM
    karmalcorn67
    Should I respond?
    My ex boyfriend emailed me after a year and a half of having no contact. We broke up three years ago, but still had some type of contact up until a year and a half ago when he starting dating, and ultimately moved in with someoene. They have since broken up, (about three months now which I have heard through the grapevine.)This month, I received an e-mail from him... All he said was Hi... I have been torn between responding and not responding. I had a very difficult time with the break up as it was initiated by him and I went through a lot and it took me almost three years to get my life back together as we lived together for five years.
  • Jan 31, 2012, 11:46 AM
    Schoolmarm97
    Honestly, I think you've already answered your own question. You had a hard time with the breakup once. Do you really want to go through that again? It's been five years, so I doubt this is a valid "Let's be friends" offer. More likely he's taking a stroll down Memory Lane and reaching out to see if he can still touch you. I'd let it just slide on by.
  • Jan 31, 2012, 03:58 PM
    pandead
    I know it won't mean much to you because you will answer if you want to, but I'd say DON'T. Don't do it, not only because he broke your heart after 5 years, moved in with someone and only contacted you when they broke up, but because his message says "Hi..." - which, to me, means "... is there any chance you can make me feel better about myself in a way or another" or "you were nice to me, I want someone to be nice to me until I don't want them anymore, would you do that for me" or most likely, "what can you do for me?"

    After 5 years, a year and a half of no contact and a relationship with someone else, if someone sends me a message saying "Hi..." and this only, he is not getting any answer back, not because I'm still hurting, but I know how much he can hurt me again, I know he probably won't apologize or understand what he did wrong; it means more trouble, disappointment leading to more pain and heartbreak. Come on, it took you 3 years to get your life back together and you are ready to destroy everything for a "Hi..."?

    I say do not reset the No Contact counter ;)
  • Jan 31, 2012, 07:05 PM
    mmresd
    No.
  • Jan 31, 2012, 09:52 PM
    talaniman
    I wouldn't respond, after all this time, I smell rebound, him needing a friendly place to feel comfortable. Old feelings rushing back and making you both stupid. Naw no response.

  • All times are GMT -7. The time now is 11:11 PM.