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-   -   My son hates me (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=629176)

  • Jan 20, 2012, 07:51 PM
    audrey150
    My son hates me
    I am at loss. My son hates me. He would get on the phone and tell his father how much he hates me and how ignorant and foolish I am. I have sacrifice so much for him. He use to be loving and funny and we would often laugh together, but now he even insult the way I look. Saying demeaning things to me. I am beginning to hate him. What can I do? I know in my heart and I have asked person close to me if I am a bad mother and the answer is always no. What can I do? Please help! One time he said he wished I had died when I was sick. What is wrong with him? I just can't take this anymore.
  • Jan 20, 2012, 07:57 PM
    J_9
    How old is your son? Without knowing this, it's hard to respond with age appropriate advice.
  • Jan 20, 2012, 08:08 PM
    audrey150
    My son is sixteen years old

  • Jan 20, 2012, 09:00 PM
    stephen1942
    Send him to Military school.
  • Jan 21, 2012, 07:09 PM
    anjsur28
    I can understand How bad you feel.
    Whether your frequently tell he hate. Or it is due arose to out of certain conflict.
    First breath relax..
    This happens in most of the people life either may be between a son and a mom or between husband and wife or friends.
    Take your son out and ask what sort of your approach made him such a way he feels.
    Give him a chance to describe his greviences about you.
    Listen to him actively when he tells, Negotiate with him or .change the way you control him.
    Tell him how you felt when he spoke about politely.

    Please never take it inside when people tell anything about when they are angry or depressed. Its just comes out from their mind without any truth.

    Learn Assertive skill to deal your son there are many Assertive Books are available.

    Love him again love him unconditionally that's what great about mom and son isn't it?
    Don't mind you both will be all right.
    God Bless You Both.
    Post if you have any in future.
  • Feb 4, 2012, 11:41 AM
    talaniman
    I get the impression you are divorced from his dad, and living with someone else. Could this be a cause for his anger, and bad behavior?
  • Feb 4, 2012, 12:15 PM
    Wondergirl
    Respond to him with humor and don't even address many of his complaints. (Certainly don't complain and cry! That'll make him despise you even more.) Instead move the conversation into a subject that would be productive and much less volatile or upsetting. "I am planning to make a batch of cookies this afternoon. Which kind should I make?" (and ask him to help?) or "I'm going grocery shopping tomorrow morning. Let's work on a list so I'll know what to buy."

    Do you know what he's interested in? Role-playing games, the computer, cars, football?? Find out and read up on what it is and ask him intelligent questions.

    My sons at this age didn't even want to be seen with me in public or admit I was their mother, so it's normal to begin with. If he's been subjected to family stresses, he will be especially angry and defensive.

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