Troubles with my girlfriend...
I have been with my girlfriend for 5 months now, and I can say that we have been through a lot. In the start of our relationship everything was swell. As we approached our 2nd month of our relationship we started to argue. Argue about things that really weren't a big deal to me. One that stirred up most of our arguments was about her ex. She broke up with him because of him cheating on her, and that she loved him.
What I don't get is her still talking to him, as if nothing bad happened between the two. Further more the arguments didn't stop; subject matter? You've guessed it her ex. Now it got to the point where I was now uncomfortable with her talking to him. She admitted to me the other day after playing a game of dare or truth that she still had feelings for him. I got mad and wanted to leave, and break up with her, but she cried, and told me continuously that she'll do everything to make this work between me n her, and that she's so sorry.
So I gave her a chance, and because I love her I forgave her. 3 to 4 days later I caught her texting him since before Christmas. Again I was mad, but this time I was more hurt, and in the way at the same time didn't know what and how to feel. We are in the process of fixing things now, because I can't let o of her, and I don't want to give up on us. I love this girl to death, and I have never ever hurt her emotionally, or physically, and never will.
I want to trust her again, and love her like no other person have. Please help I really need great advisor's right now. I'm stuck and don't know what to do. People tell me to leave her but my heart doesn't, even though its been hurt by the same person. I love her to death... help!
What to do when you get dumped!!
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QUOTE by Gs_gifttoher;
( today before I went to class we had a serious talk, because she just had a talk with her mom and dad about us in the process of us tlking I had ask her if whe wanted to break up, it took a minute but she replied yes. She wanted to find herself again
Finally some honesty!!! At least now she has told you what she wants, to be single and on her own.
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and that she says that she still believes in us and that we'll find our way to each other again...
That may be true, but you better be skeptical until and IF it will actually happen. Until then all you have are hopeful words to either hide her true feelings, or soften the blow of a break up. Probably BOTH!!
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I want to believe this I really do but what if sometime down the road she moves on?
What if she does? Just like you asked before, what if you get hurt again? Well you have gotten hurt again, right.
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I'm hurt but I manned up and told myself to believe...
Believe what? That she has hurt you AGAIN? Yes she did, NOW its your turn to make a decision, a choice for yourself. More honesty is needed... SELF honesty!!
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I love her still and can't let go... I want to hold on so that when she's ready my arms will be wide open for her...
OH CRAP!! Of course you still love her, and DON'T want to let go... yet! She just dumped you and you are in shock, denial, and disbelief! In time that will change and you will feel stupid standing in limbo with open arms waiting for her to change her mind. Especially when sh moves on and dates others.
Get your gear together, thank her for a lovely time, wish her well, and Disappear from her life and have NO CONTACT, so you can heal, and deal with reality. That's what helps you deal with reality, hurt feelings, and move you forward.
Talaniman Rule - When you get dumped, you disappear, and go back to doing your own thing without her
Build a life that you enjoy with friends, family, and activities that make you happy. After the emotional dust settles, and the shock has worn off. Takes time.