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-   -   Is it OK to cry? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=628588)

  • Jan 17, 2012, 07:36 PM
    Countrygirl78
    Is it OK to cry?
    Last night me and my aunt and uncle went out for my aunts birthday and when they were dancing together I felt sad and lonely because my husband had to work and he didn't get home till really late and I felt sad because no one would dance with me. Not even my aunt or uncle would dance with me. I've had a secret crush on my uncle since I was a kid. He's so cute and he's really funny too. I tried so hard not to cry. I wanted to dance with my unlce but I was too shy to ask him. I told him I didn't feel good and he took me home and he stayed there with me until my husband got home. When he got home I started crying my eyes out. I know it's sounds silly but I'm 19 now and I still have a crush on my uncle. He's 35 almost 36. My husband is 22. We just got married in October. Is it OK to cry? Is it normal to have a crush on your uncle too?
  • Jan 17, 2012, 07:59 PM
    JudyKayTee
    Is it normal to have a "crush" on your uncle? I don't know if it's "normal" but it's certainly inappropriate.

    Is it okay to cry when you are married and the person you have a crush on won't dance with you? I have no idea. Again - is it appropriate? No.

    Put yourself in your husband's shoes - he's crying because he has a crush on his aunt and she won't dance with him.

    You're wrong. It doesn't sound silly. It sounds immature.

    If you don't want to be married then get out of the marriage and give your husband a chance at finding happiness.

    A crush on someone? It happens. To carry on to this extent? Totally inappropriate.

    And to lust after your uncle right before your aunt's eyes? Disgusting.
  • Jan 17, 2012, 08:05 PM
    Fr_Chuck
    No it is not OK to the point that you do. In fact it sounds unhealthy. Your uncle may well know you feel that way and did not dance with you just for that reason, or his wife may not feel right with you dancing with him.

    And it was your AUNTS birthday, not your uncles birthday, it was suppose to be about her. In fact your childish behavior may have ruined her party.

    Why did he stay with you ( was aunt there also?) you are a grown person, no one needs to stay with you.

    I would suggest serious professional counseling and stop contact with your uncle.
  • Jan 21, 2012, 03:33 AM
    geminichick
    It's not healthy for you to have a crush on your uncle. I would suggest that you receive counselling and spend no alone time with your uncle. You have to realize that he is your uncle. Crying because you had nobody to dance with and your husband had to work late is pretty immature.
  • Jan 21, 2012, 07:16 AM
    JudyKayTee
    It is VERY inappropriate for you to be babysitting for an extended period (or, for that matter, at all) with your Uncle's child - https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/childr...ce-628634.html

    I see BIG family problems here - and some of them can/will involve a 5 year old.
  • Jan 26, 2012, 11:59 AM
    baldskullcap
    There is some pretty good advice posted here. A crush on your uncle? I have no right to call it inappropriate, but it certainly is unusual. I don't know how to respond to that, so I'm not going to try. You have a responsibility to your husband first. Don't make him a victim in all of this.
  • Jan 26, 2012, 02:54 PM
    JudyKayTee
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by baldskullcap View Post
    There is some pretty good advice posted here. A crush on your uncle? I have no right to call it inappropriate, but it certainly is unusual. I don't know how to respond to that, so I'm not going to try. You have a responsibility to your husband first. Don't make him a victim in all of this.


    Wow - do we ever disagree on this one! She's 19, married for 4 months (give or take), upset and crying because her aunt and uncle (a married couple) danced together - so upset that the uncle took her home and stayed with her (crying) until her husband came home to console her.

    This woman has NO boundaries!
  • Mar 17, 2012, 10:12 PM
    baldskullcap
    JudyKayTee, how do we disagree on this? I just said that she has a responsibility to her husband first. I have no right to judge her or anyone else.

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