I cut myself, always. Mostly at night, there is not a night that goes by without my causing some sort of a injury to my body and yes on purpose. I don't know why I do it. Yes there is a lot of things going on at home and they get to me heaps. My grandma passed away nearly a year ago and till this day I break down when I think about her we were really close. I cut myself but not too deep just enough to feel the pain to make me forget about the emotional pain. I'd do anything to forget about emotional pain, it becomes too much to handle. But my only worry is I harm myself for no reason at times, I just sit down in my room and than I start crying; breaking down and I start to cut. Why do I do all this? No one knows and I don't want to tell anyone. They won't understand, if I can not understand why I do this to myself I don't believe any one else will understand. I just wish I knew why I do this to myself. And at times it feels like the world is on my shoulders I'm sick of everything. :'(

You also do it because it's the one thing you believe you can control in your life. You couldn't control if your grandmother lived or died, and you think you can't control how your family treats you. You CAN control your own physical pain, and how much you give yourself.

But you know what?--you CAN control how people treat you.

I did the same as you because of all the pain and pressure but I stopped and I talked to my friends and family and they told me to just write my feelings down and the best thing to is to talk to your family maybe they will loosen up

Please talk to your family, or your religious leader, or your counselor at school.