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-   -   Long distance break. (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=627225)

  • Jan 12, 2012, 04:49 PM
    nicholashi
    Long distance break.
    Me and my girlfriend are in a long distance relationship. We have been for about 7 months now, and we have an absolutely great relationship. We love each other very, very much, and we have it great together. The only problem is that being in a long distance relationship, we can't see each other often, only about once a month, and because of certain reasons I can't go see her when ever I want.

    And my girlfriend being a very physical person, feels like she needs physical contact with me, and since she can't get it from me, she's asking for a break of about a week to be with another guy who obviously likes her. She is saying that because she feels that she needs to be close to someone, that she is going to "accidentally" end up doing too much with some guy, and hurting me a lot.

    I told her I would forgive her, because I love her, but she wants me to be able to trust her. And I don't know what to do. The fact is we talked about it for a long time, and we figured out that it is the best option for both of us, because she gets what she wants, the contact with someone that she wants, and it's the thing that would hurt me the least. It was either that, or an open relationship, and I don't like that choice at all, but the thing is that it's still going to hurt me a lot, and I'm not exactly sure how I'll react to it, and I'm not sure how things will be with me and her afterward, and I'm worried.

    Does anyone have any good advise that would help me, and if anyone does not understand what I explained then ask about what you don't understand.
  • Jan 12, 2012, 08:21 PM
    talaniman
    I understand completely, you have a female that wants to explore and get her rocks off with some one else, so she asked your permission to cheat, but wants a break to make it legit.

    Of course you took the lesser of two evils, because you are desperate to keep this female, and think letting her screw a few guys when she needs to is the way to do it.

    Its all a load of crap by the way, and telling a female you would forgive her because she is highly physical, and wants to get her rocks off with a guy because you are not there IS an open relationship, semantics be damned!

    Changing what you call it, doesn't change the actions, and you should have exercised your third option, dumping her to find a female that didn't need to screw another guy in between your monthly visits. But you are to desperate to see that.

    However you are right, as what she is doing with another, with your permission will screw your head up, long after the distance is no longer an issue. If you didn't want to keep her so bad, you would never agreed to this baloney, or even been swayed by her excuses.

    So you will pay the consequences of going along with her cheating, and may get dumped because of it later. Or worse, have to give permission later for her to screw another guy down the road, since you have already shown you will go along with her BS!

    Sorry guy, you are hurting yourself in the long run, by being so desperate you allow bad behavior, and no doubt you will get more of it.

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