I've been going out with my boyfriend for nearly 2 years now. Its been my first long term relationship and I have learnt a lot about love. In the past I was a big flirt and was never shy around boys. I only went on dates and hada few men chasing me. (not trying to sound too big headed)
But this guy was different and I had to make him mine. So now here we are, Happy and strong and living together.
But before I even knew him he was good friend with another girl. She's very pretty and they got on like a house on fire. Even when we started dating he was still hanging out with her, he even told me he even fancied her a bit when we started dating. But I was jealous and suspious.

But over time she went to uni and they couldn't hang out but they do still occasionally speak to each other. And he's always checking her Facebook page.
He admitted a bit ago when we were drinking together that he would have gone out with her if I hadn't of come along. And whenever she's actually come down and come to see him (she also sees a lot of her friends)
He's never really spoken to her an tells me he had nothing to say to her. I also told him that I'm OK with him seeing her because I have a lot of guy friends too and it wouldn't be fair if I told him he couldn't see his 'girl' friends and I was able to see my friends.

He doesn't talk about her a lot in front of me.

He's a very laid back guy who's quite sensitive but acts dead strong.

But am I being messed about a bit or should I stick to the one I love? Is he still thinking about her when he's with me or does he still wish he'd gone out with her?

I feel confused and a bit lonely.

If you were able to read and understand all of this, then help me out and please give me some opinions and advice.

Your insecurities are showing, and I suppose we all have them every now and then. What triggers yours right now? Could it be wondering where this is headed after two years? Wondering will it last another two years?

I suspect its fear of the unknown, or being uncertain. Maybe its time for you to talk of the future, and see what he thinks? He probably is in a comfort zone, and doesn't light the old fires the way he use to, or are you in a dull cycle right now?

The list is endless as to why you feel as you do, but only you know. So share your thoughts about what I have written.

He wants her and isn't open about their relationship? Having galfriends is one thing -not being totally committed to you is another. Some guys don't have the guts to be single, especially when they want to look desirable to the girl they like -which might be her.
You have the choice to be with him, but you also deserve better.
What would he do if he could go over to the grass on the other side?