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-   -   My partner watches porn, has many magazines, and also a lot of other temptations (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=621881)

  • Dec 23, 2011, 11:55 AM
    llill
    My partner watches porn, has many magazines, and also a lot of other temptations
    My longterm partner and I rarely have sex and if we do he initiates it as I have been turned down to many times. He doesn't want physical touching kissing even just cuddling up on the couch is always an issue. My issue is that he watches porn, enjoys adult magazines and pretty much the temptation of looking at naked or even just attractive women regularly, he has pleased himself many times when I am not around and on one oocasion when I was sleeping in the next room. He reassures me he loves me and he is attracted to me, so this is very hard for me to get my head around as I know I am attractive and his type and we are happy when this is not brought up. Is it addiction or is there some other reason for this? He has never cheated but all of this behaviour feels like he has.
  • Dec 23, 2011, 02:03 PM
    lostwife00
    It is cheating, that's how my husband started. Striper's, online porn, pictures via text, then to his affairs . Remember ITS NOT YOU NOR YOUR FAULT! He's a ticking time bomb. Sit him down and CALMLY tell him your feelings and try to avoid you words. Sounds like your pointing fingers and he may withdraw himself to you. Good luck to you both
  • Dec 23, 2011, 02:12 PM
    Fr_Chuck
    I would expect it is more to this, when you first meet , was there more sex? You said sleeping in the other room, do you share the same bedroom or separate rooms.

    If there was regular sex to start, when did it start to change.
    Did he always look at porn or did it start at some point
  • Dec 27, 2011, 12:31 PM
    jenniepepsi
    Talk to him. Explain your fears and tell him everything honestly.

    In my opinion, there is nothing wrong here except the lack of communication. My husband frequently relieves himself if I am unavailable (or just plain old don't feel like it)

    Its possible that you are unintentionally giving him the 'stay away' signals.
    Tell him, flat out, that you want to have sex with him.
  • Dec 27, 2011, 06:43 PM
    smoothy
    Cripes already... its NOT cheating any more than you watching a Brad Pitt movie is cheating. Guys enjoy looking at the naked female body right up until they take their last breath. Lack of vital signs is when they stop.

    How old is he? How is his health.. Does he have a lot of stress in his life? What kind of medications is he taking?
  • Dec 27, 2011, 07:08 PM
    Wondergirl
    masturbating to porn = heating up a TV dinner and gobbling it own alone

    making love = cooking a full meal of meat, potatoes, veggies, a Jello mold, and dessert and sharing with someone you love

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