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-   -   The one..? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=621720)

  • Dec 22, 2011, 07:29 PM
    DiamondDaughter
    The one..?
    How do you know when you find "The one"?
  • Dec 22, 2011, 08:06 PM
    Wondergirl
    There isn't such a person. Most of us can happily partner or marry more than one person during our lifetime; otherwise, widows and widowers and divorced people would never remarry. I've dated lots of guys and can think of at least four I would have been willing to marry--and would have probably had a good life with (and I'm picky).

    The romantic, swooning Hollywood idea of "the one" and "passionate love forever" is over-rated. A stable and productive union is a lot more than that (and takes a lot of work to make it happen).
  • Dec 22, 2011, 09:06 PM
    DiamondDaughter
    Thank you I know what you're talking about... But what if you found that one person who makes you happy and you love to pieces?
  • Dec 22, 2011, 09:15 PM
    Wondergirl
    In six months or five years or when you are 62, there will probably be another one whom you will say the same about. Just out of curiosity, how old are you right now?

    And how long have you felt this way about that person?
  • Dec 22, 2011, 09:18 PM
    DiamondDaughter
    Well I'm 16 turning 17 + I feel like like about 3 year :/
  • Dec 22, 2011, 09:23 PM
    Wondergirl
    Are you planning on some kind of career, want to go to college or a trade school?
  • Dec 22, 2011, 09:25 PM
    DiamondDaughter
    I'm at college doing foundion of choose+maths+english and after that I'm going to do my childcare level 3:)
  • Dec 22, 2011, 09:30 PM
    Wondergirl
    My advice to you is to be sure to finish your education.

    Do you make him happy, and he loves you to pieces?
  • Dec 22, 2011, 09:32 PM
    DiamondDaughter
    Alright:) Thank you + He makes me so happy but he doesn't love me you see we broke up about 2&half years ago and I can't sto0p thinking about him:/ I know I need to move on... And I am tryng but it's not working.. </3
  • Dec 22, 2011, 09:35 PM
    Wondergirl
    Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaah. It's time to get over him and to open yourself up to new possibilities.

    He wasn't "the one."
  • Dec 22, 2011, 09:38 PM
    DiamondDaughter
    Like what? I try to move on... Had 3boyfriends after him haha I thought I was over him but then I saw him the other day.
  • Dec 22, 2011, 09:42 PM
    Wondergirl
    How about this: Don't get into any relationships for six months to a year. Give yourself time to heal, time to get over him and realize he's not "the one" for you, time to do well in school and be the best you can be.

    Spare the poor guys from falling for you and then finding out they aren't who you said you were.
  • Dec 22, 2011, 09:59 PM
    DiamondDaughter
    I had time to heal: 3year!
  • Dec 22, 2011, 10:04 PM
    Wondergirl
    You've had time but haven't healed. If you had healed, you would see him as just another guy. I'm guessing you haven't even started to heal.
  • Dec 22, 2011, 10:07 PM
    DiamondDaughter
    First post merged with 2nd one.

    Nopeee.

    Boyfriend troubles

    A few days ago my boyfriend saw me play fighting with his best mate. He thought it was something more, then asked me over Facebook if I was cheating with him. I said no because he was only a friend and we were having fun. He said OK then was saying things like he was a useless boyfriend things.

    Now we are on a break but I don't know if I want to get back with him because there is no trust!

    Help please....
  • Dec 23, 2011, 02:39 PM
    talaniman
    Its not a matter of trust, but his jealousy and insecurity with himself. Maybe its immaturity, I don't know, but it has created a conflict. If your reassurance is not enough, then maybe NOT getting back with him is a wise choice.

    I wonder, could the feelings over this have you thinking of your other ex, that you have seen recently??

    The one you think you are not over yet?
  • Dec 24, 2011, 08:01 AM
    DiamondDaughter
    Mmm:/ I cannot do anything about the one I'm not over, but I want this relationship to work this time, but I don't know what to do...
  • Dec 24, 2011, 08:42 AM
    talaniman
    Unless he gets over himself, and you two can talk, rationally, not much you can do.

    Have you not talked this past week, since the break?
  • Dec 25, 2011, 07:27 AM
    DiamondDaughter
    Yeahh we have been talking like bestfriends but we don't when we go out together.
  • Dec 25, 2011, 08:22 AM
    talaniman
    So you are talking, and going out, but not resolving your issues? WHY NOT??

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