When myit boyfriend and II "mess around" sometimes I have an orgasm quickly but other times it seems to take a long time. Why does this happen? There are also times we have anal sex and its very tight but others its loose and we haven't "messed around"sometimes for a couple of days. Please help

Some women NEVER orgasm, so think yourself lucky. It's not going to take the same amount of time every time. You'll be at different stages of arousal. Different erogenous zones can effect it, too.

X Dani

Sexual stimulation for women is 99% mental and 1% physical.

You aren't going to be in the same mental state every time you have a sexual encounter, which is why there are different times and different levels of physical arousal.