I am a 33 year old guy, and my girlfriend is 22. I know she is way younger than me, I still look like 25 to 29. We have been going out for more than 5 years. I always pay for everything when I take her out, because she usually has no money, and I treat her nice, but I can also be a jerk when she gets me mad for dumb things.

She is always complaining, and wants everything right away her way because she is very inpatient, she is spoiled like her perents raised her, she never pays bills or anything, but her phone bill, she barely works, she is greedy, and selfish, but I don't ask for anything in returned but for her just to appreciate for what I do for her.

I do pay rent, and pays lots of bills, I sell cars for a living and fix computers, I don't have a job, but it would not be enough to support a family because she wants me to pay everything. We don't have any kids, she still lives with her parents, and I still live with my mom, but I take care of her as much as I can, cause she don't work.

I really love this girl, and she says she loves me too, but we have broken up many times, and always get back together. Its usually me that begs her back, and I am to easy, and its always for a dumb reason. She tells me we have no future, that we're wasting time, and she claims she will go to school, but does not really do it cause she gets lazy. She wants me to get a real job, but I have been doing okay with what I do, but I am looking forward in getting a good job in the future that offers good money to raise a family.

She wants to get married because all her friends are getting married, but I am not ready because of my finiacial security, she wants me to put everything to the table and pay for everything, because she says she is worth it all. She don't know how to cook, or really do anything, her friends always brainwash her, and tell her bad things about me, then she throws it in my face. I helped this girl a lot. I have been like her teacher, I gave her some money to buy a car, not all of it but something. Her parents put up the rest. I let her use my dealer plates and the car insurance, fixed her car up all nice, and put days of work into it, when I had things to do. I am not complaning about nothing, I just saying what I do for her. I do it because I really love her a lot, but she is not always happy, she is nice when she wants to be. We had our good times, but she don't put a lot of effort like I do, we barely have sex, and its always when she wants too, I am nothing but been a nice boyfriend most of the time.

Guys like me are rare, I don't cheat, I am very faithful, I can't have lady friends because she is very jealous, but I am okay with it, she has a Facebook full of guys I don't even know, she never wants to give me her password, because she says I should trust her, I have a Facebook too and if I add a girl or something she will get very mad, she thinks I flirt with girls but I am good guy and she never believes me. When I give her gifts she is very picky, she compares me to her rich cousins, she has friends that have boyfriends with a lot of money and nice cars, they really don't like me either cause I am too old for her.

Her family has been okay with our age difference and they like me, she recently told me she wants a rich guy for no reason, she said both of us don't really have money. That's when it really hurt me like crazy, after all I do for her, always picked her up, and paid for everything, gave her gifts, I just spolied her like her parents did. She thinks she is very pretty and should get everything for free, she is okay looking, I am not a ugly guy either, I had nothing but problems with girls, and always get treated like ****. I ignored her again, I haven't talk to her since Thanksgiving, almost two weeks, maybe a text here and there like a goodmorning or goodnight,and I message her in Facebook, to tell her how I felt She kind of ignored me too,and did not seem to care.

She has not called me either, I don't want to call her because she was the one that told me some bogus things, she wants to feel like the victim, and I always try and try and beg her. I really love her so much and I am hurt, I feel like I am not good enough for her.


If anybody can help me here please do, I will appreciated it so much..!

YOur assumption of her being spoiled is pretty spot dead on! This girl is not worth your time and effort. She is a spoiled brat who sounds pretty controlling and also has jealousy issues. YOu should never just trust someone for whatever reasons they ask you to. She has put nothing into the relationship and just expected you to cater to all of her needs. She's the one that needs to get a job and pull up her big girl pants and act like a woman, not a 5 year old child. There is someone out there for you, but, she is not included in that mix of women. The best thing to do is not to contact her. She's going to end up alone in this world with an attitude like that.

Sorry for your heart break, but breaking up with her is probably the best thing you can do for yourself, your future, and your wallet. The relationship sounds highly dysfunctional.

I know your right geminichick,I am going through a lot right now and it really hurts me,I have not called her since like two weeks, just like some emails about what is going on,but sounds like she don't care,she still has pictures of me in Facebook,I feel like I am the one doing things wrong all the time,last time we got mad was over Facebook jealous issues and she talked to me in like 2 days only to ask me to let her barrow 30 for a phone she wanted,2 weeks later this happens,she has been working more days now because of the holidays,I know she has money now,I want to get my plates back I let her use,I don't understand, I know I did act like a jerk too because of what she told me,that she wants a rich guy,because I think her friend has boy friend with money,and she thinks I am a jerk,we have gotten into worse fights than this and she always comes back but I beg,only that this I want to play hard to get, but I think it might not work,she already had told me she was worth it all,somebody put stuff in her head, I know,I did tell her not to hang out with that friend, that's telling her crap,I am not trying to be controlling,but just wanted my girlfriend not hang out with her because of that,not to mention that her friend might have took 100 dollars from my girlfriend lost when was hanging out,cause somebody else told me that her friend did stuff like that to somebody else before,


I know my girlfriend is kind of slow and I am a guy that has experience and I am very nice,the only thing is that I don't have is a lot of money,or a apartment that I live bymyself,she complains about privacy which is another problem, but my room has a door,we barely have sex,but I don't mind,I know she wants somebody to take care of her and pay for everything like a man is suppose to,but I think it should be 50/50,because I cannot afford her at this time,I kind of make like almost 500 a week sometimes,maybe a little more,but I spend a lot,I know there is a lot of good womem out there,who would like be with a guy like me,I have been unhappy and depressed,this girl has made me happy sometimes,I know she is not perfect,she also says she rather be alone,and find out for herself what is out there,I never dated a girl my age, just these young girls,I just want my girlfriend to appreciate me and treat how I deserve... please help..

Joey,

I've been in a similar situation and the result is a broken heart,. for you. This girl is 22 going on 15. She sounds immature, spoiled and downright selfish. You want to know what the best thing to do is? Let her go meet a rich guy and see how happy that'll make her. She might get her 'fix' for a short while, but then she'll be on the road again trying to find the next best thing. Girls like her are never satisfied and are always under the illusion that 'something better is out there'. You obviously have tried your best for this girl and your best doesn't seem to be good enough for her. Is that what you want from the girl that shares your life with you? Lack of appreciation? Lack of trust? Lack of respect? The worst thing is her telling you she wants a rich guy to your face. Money is what will make her happy? Dude, this girl is way beneath you and does not deserve a penny from you any longer. Tell her to go find herself a rich guy and don't speak to her any more. You have to respect yourself and know your worth. It's not easy, I know, but short-term pain is way better than long-term suffering and anguish. You're better of without her, believe me.

Good luck bud.

Joey;

My experience with dating someone younger is not really a very good one. They feel because of the age difference that you are a mother/father figure and a partner. You are not her father. I do understand that things are very difficult but you are right that things should be 50/50 in a relationship. YOu don't need to look after her. No one needs to look after her. She should be looking after herself.

If she wants a rich guy, let her try and find one. I wonder though how long the relationship would last with all ofher demands and the need to be looked after and catered to? I don't think anything would be ever good enough for her.

I don't know much about legal issues but is it a possibility that you could go the police or to a lawyer about your license plates. If someone on here who is a lawywer or deals with legal matters maybe they could kindly answer this one for us.

Joey, the sooner this girl is out of your life, the sooner you can move on with your own life. YOu do deserve a WOMAN who will love a appreciate the way you deserve to be treated. Not like a doormat. YOu have rights, you have feelings, you are a man with wants and desires in life that need to be fulfilled, know is she doing all these things for you? Please consider this. Make a list of things that you would want in a woman and a list of things you don't want in a woman. Weigh her up against that list and see what you have, because personally, I don't think you will see any positives, do you?

Please take care of you!

Thanks geminichick,she just called me and broke up with me,I knew it was coming,I know there is nothing I can do ,we were going out for like 5 years and 10 months,I am very hurted at this moment,I was insisting and tellig her why she wants to break up with me,until she got mad and said she cheating on me a millions of times,which I think she lied,maybe so I would get mad and hang up,she said,she is not happy but that I am a great nice person and would not be hard to find somebody,believe me she has told me this many times,and we get back together,she says she don't love me,that's why she cheated,I know she does love me,because she told me before and it felt real,I told her I really love her,or there is something wrong with me,that girls don't like,I must be doing something wrong with sex,I did not do it good enough,


But she said she is not looking for nobody and won't until she gets her head straight and work on herself,I honestly think there is somebody else and she is lying,she now erased me from Facebook.I know there is another guy,but who knows maybe not,she broke up with me so many times and told me the same thing,then ends up calling me like in a couple of weeks telling me she wants to go get back or be friends,its not that easy after all those years,can it be the real break up of all,is she really done,its hard,I really feel something for her,


She said, we were just use to each other, but I do love her,she is the kind of person that says one thing, one day and then changes her mind constantly,she did cry for me before and told me she did love me,maybe she is going through some problems,we see the same numbers,we even called each other at the same time with knowing we were,texts,places,I just wish she would treat me better that's all,will she be back?? I can wait for some weeks months?? please help...

Joey, the one truth she has stated, it is hard for you to hear, is that she doesn't love you. Don't allow whatever issues she has become your issues. Only she can fix herself. We can't change anyone. It we be nice if we could but we can't. This relationship was toxic to you and your whole overall well-being. A toxic relationship affects your physical, emotional, mental and spiritual well-being. Don't allow yourself to loose who you are over her. If she truly cared she would not have cheated on you, nor would she have used you finacially. Relationships with someone younger really don't work. The one relationship I had, he was 22 and I was 35 at the time. It felt truly like I was his mother. Giving and giving and not getting anything in return.

In time things will get better. YOu need time to heal. It's like a loss. Going through kind of a grieving process, I would call it. No matter how difunctional the relationship was to us, we still go through that. YOu have so much to offer. Focus on tomorrow, your future. YOu have a lot of love to give someone, don't waste it on someone that does not deserve your love. Today is today and tomorrow is tomorrow. Something wonderful lays waiting in the horizon. Stay strong!

geminichick you have no idea how it feels,it felt like real love,like she was all into me,I have not slep for a day,everything your saying is very true,I have gotten my hearth broken so many times before and I hate it,I feel like 55 and dying,like she sucked the life out me,she has did it before,and came back,but leaving me hurt like this,its just killing me with pain,why are women like that,I would never hurt a women like that,nobody problaby broke her hearth yet, when there is a good guy, they don't see it,maybe she is right and she don't love me,but deep inside me, it tells she does love me,but is not ready for me,I never had any girlfriends when I was young in my 20s,I was very very shy,and lost my virginity at 27 with my first girlfriend,the first girlfriend used me and stole from me,dated for like a few months,she wanted me back,but I had met this one,which was my second girlfriend now,that's why it hurts me so much,we went out so many years,no other guy would handle what I did,I know she will find out,I was worth it all,I am going to give her some time to think and not even bother her at all,if she is meant to be,time will say,


Christmas is around the corner,I really don't have any family,she was like everything for me,and I wanted a christmas present,I have no idea what happen,my niece and my mom loved her a lot,we would hug her like crazy and give her lots of love,that is the most beautiful thing in life and the feeling of it,that's why money is not everything,to her money is what she loves,I will miss her dogs,her mom and dad were so nice,I hope she realizes what she is losing...

I understand a little better than you think. But I'm not here to talk about me. Were talking about your problems. Not all women are like that. But it will take you time. YOu haven't found the right woman yet.

I'm very sorry that you will have no one for the holidays. That must hurt a lot and be very painful. I'm so very sorry. Is there anyone you can be with during the holiday season? Do you mind me asking what happened to your niece and your mother? YOu don't have to answer that if it makes you uncomfortable.

Yes geminichick my mom lives in the first floor and my niece with her mom,but they are leaving for a vacation,I did not mention I am in house arrest for driving with a suspended license charge,been in it almost 3 months,I know that played a role in the relatioship,but she being selfish, I ended up getting in trouble,I gotten in trouble maybe cause of her,but I don't blame her,she said, she would wait,but I guess not,she did come to visit me often,and it made feel good,that's why it now hurts even more,knowing I am trapped and can't even get out,my plan is to take a vacation far far away for a couple of weeks and clear my mind and just cry when I get off that housearrest,I am all mess up,but everything you tell me helps a lot I thank you so much,so might be all alone for christmas,this is just going to make a stronger person,I just know I don't deserve this,she likes to see me hurting after all I did,and can't just go on and like another girl,that will take a long time,I just hope I heal in two weeks,cause it usually takes more than a month,I been through it before,but next time I wish to find the women of my dreams that won't hurt me anymore,and this nightmare ends... but I would never mind taking her back,but I will do a lot of thinking,its going to be bumpy ride,the only thing that will help is to go skydiving..

Joey,

You came here asking for help. You knew you were going to get some advice. I usually tell people not to listen to others and do what feels right, as long as it's in the best interest of all parties involved; in other words, the best advice is one not given. However, because you're thinking with your wounded heart and not with your head, you need to listen to talaniman and geminichick... you need to CUT ALL TIES WITH YOUR EX. You know the saying 'hind sight is 20-20'? It means that when you look back at this period one day, you'll realise how silly this all is and how different you wish you acted. Right now it's your ego that's broken, not the real you. You KNOW you're a great person, you KNOW you're a giving and caring person, you KNOW you're a loyal and trustworthy person.. you're just trying to get her to see these things and treat you better. Why would she? You've always given her everything she wanted and much much more. She's always gotten what she wanted and is now looking at her cousins who are dating rich guys and feeling jealousy. If you want a woman who'll appreciate you, this one is not it.

Joey, be strong dude and stop wishing her back. Have you ever heard of anyone who was diagnosed with cancer, fight the disease, get rid of it and then wish it back? Absolutely not... so why are you wishing your cancer back?

I know I may sound a bit harsh, man, but I'm giving it to you like I see it, and believe me when I say I've been through something very similar. Someone who's good for you will not make you feel this way. If she comes around and decides she does love you, she'll let you know one day, and if you're still available, you let her know... but for now, STOP ALL CONTACT and give yourself time to heal. You're a lot stronger than you think you are. Now start believing it.

Luckychuky13 I can't believe how much I am getting from here,I thank everybody here ,I am trying so hard not to feel hurt,I know, it did hurt her cause she cried,she knows what she has,even her own brother told she was crazy,one day she is yelling and mad and another day she is very happy,I know its not me,I know I did my part,and for that it makes feel good,I just wonder why it happens,but I know its another stage in life,after all the things she did,she did have a good heart,that's why I don't want to give up that easily,I was her like her teacher,that's something special,we had this strange connection,that would even call each other at the same time a lot of times,or text,she had like two different sides the good and bad,that's why I kind of knew she has like a mental depression problem or something,because her mom has it,and would go really crazy without medicine


I just got to put more details about it so you can understand it better,I know she will figure it out,and what ever it is, I will let it be,she is very jealous,and she can be testing me out too,to see if I really love he,I will leave her alone,and not bother her,the only way she might have a chance to change a little, is maybe something happens to her... sorry to write about her so much,but it makes me feel better... I just amagine how many girls are looking for a guy like me... I am very rare,I have a very good heart in some ways,I went through a lot when I was kid,my dad would drink a lot and hit us and my mom too,he was really strict,and he never spoiled us,and that love my dad so much,he left like years ago,I miss him even if he was bad person,my mom is a very nice person and I love her a lot,we don't have much family were we live,but what ever happen when I was little kid, did affect me mentally,maybe that's why I am such a nice person,because seen it all,and why I am so weak too,I got my own personal problems,combined all, it's a disaster that I am going through,that girl has not seen nothing yet,its only the beginning for her,I just want to be happy and hopefully god lets me live more years...

Joey,

I don't mean to be rude mate, but get on your *****ing feet and quit being a *****. That's coming from someone who dated a spoiled little b*tch, for 2 and a half years. Nothing I did was ever good enough for her, reading your original post reminded me of how much crap I put up with because I thought I would never find anyone after her. It's a year and a half later and I have the kindest, most beautiful girl in the world, because I wised up and finally walked away from a bad situation that was only hurting me. You need to stop listening to your emotions and be rational. Girls like your ex will never be happy, they pathologically ***** up relationships and cause drama. It's nothing to do with you. You seem like a nice guy. So move on and find someone is isn't a piece of sh*t.

Rude yes, but the absolute truth. Joey, I hope you can see from Jimbo J's post, how moving forward, putting one foot forward and moving on to bigger and better things improves your quality of life and essentially, your sanity.

DUDE!! I have to side with Geminichick on this one. AND I really do know what I'm talking about! Try being 52 and having your on/off girlfriend over 18 years that you thought you were going to marry dump you for another guy who makes more money?! Pain - I had the West Coast Franchise! Depression - big time! Alcohol abuse, confusion, dark thoughts, and the worst thing is I realize that my self-esteem had evaporated over time. We repeated this movie many times - I was not meeting her needs - I would come back with bigger gifts, more trips etc. etc. It would work for a while and we would have that honeymoon intoxication again which made me feel great.

But inevitably even though I heard "I love you" many times you have to PAY ATTENTION to the ACTIONS. Do girls who really love you email other guys about meeting up?! Spend all their time talking with other guys when you are out with a group of friends?! After you spend a lot money (all I had at the time) on a diamond ring never wear it and tell you later that she would like something much bigger?!

I could go on but tell me some of this does not look familiar to you? And I can tell you exactly where this path goes. You are going to have to put the brakes on right now! Do you continually check your phone for emails or texts? Do you wast hours reliving some of your best times? And thinking about the ones you were going to have? Did you have her on a pedestal and think she was the most engaging girl you have ever met? Did close friends and family sense something was "off" but you started to manufacture excuses?

If any of that sounds remotely familiar - you are on dangerous ground my friend - she is starting to suck the life out of you and it is a deep hole to get out of. The reality is your in love with a vision you have created in your mind of what could be. When the actions over the years make you feel bad you push them aside and replace them feelings that make you feel good instead of listening to the painful truth your gut is handing you. I was there for years & years Bud - do not make the same mistake and put your happiness and self images in someone else's hands. It will be hard but do the following starting in the next five minutes and get "you" back - you are already sounding like you are headed into the weeds.

1. Get her off the pedestal you have put her on - she's human - not perfect, with many flaws like all of us.
2. Realize you as much as anyone on the planet is deserving of real quality love and compassion.
3. Concentrate on how her ACTIONS have made you feel - not her WORDS.
4. Start to be selfish in a good way. Time right now should on nothing but positives for you - especially the gym. Beware the bar.
5. Start really thinking about how you want to be defined - is it through your relationship - or by the type of guy you are?
6. DO NOT give away your power to anyone else - EVER! You cannot get stepped on unless you are lying down.

I know your heart is in a shambles and your eyes are closed right now - but it is a big beautiful world and there are TONS of great girls - GIVE YOURSELF PERMISSION TO BE OPEN TO MEET THEM.

Good luck Bro