I feel deeply for a friend of mine who I was attracted to for years, did not work out because I was too shy, now she realized she was in love with me... I feel as if she was my soul mate, we have been meeting up lately and just talking, but somehow I felt the way that she was giving me more, I did not feel absolute comfort being with her. She tells me worries are OK and that no one knows how will things work out. She is going through a rough period of separating from her husband and I do not want to hurt her. I told her I do not know where my feelings are even though I wrote to her I never loved anybody so much as I do her. I also told her I have never been in a relationship and so she knows about it. I just cannot figure out my mind. She is such a soul mate to me, but if I think of love I think of being with a person and being totally absorbed by that person and not having a worries of being honest without her. What is your opinion?

Is there a reason or reasons you do not feel comfortable with her? The thing is, how do you know how things will work out if you have not even taken the relationship to another level? YOu love her and she loves you. It's totally up to you. You just don't want to feel regret if sometime down the road she does find someone else and you never made the initiative to even try things out on a relationship level.

I think you are wise to keep some distance if she is still married and going through a divorce. As much as you may love each other, she will need time and space to deal with the emotions, doubts, frustrations, memories, etc. left from her marriage. It is not healthy for her to jump from one relationship into another one. It isn't fair of her to use you as crutch while she heals (even if she doesn't conscious realize that she is.)

I am not sure I understand what you mean by this: but if I think of love I think of being with a person and being totally absorbed by that person and not having a worries of being honest without her.

What are your expectations for a relationship?

Are you worried about her attention being divided between you and her child?

Are you concerned that your feelings for her aren't quite the same when you aren't together/talking?

Are you concerned about what or who else she might be involved with or if she still has feelings for her husband?

She will have contact with her child's father especially while the child is growing. Is that part of your concern?

I would not be meeting in private with her alone. I would keep it professional. If latter after she is divorced ( if that is what she does) then you can see if the relationship will go somewhere.

I can understand having intense feelings for another human, but this one is married and has a child, and an uncertain future, and no doubt needy of someone who cares.

Keep your distance, and stay within boundaries of good behavior and rush into NOTHING with her. Frankly, soul mate or not, you may be distracting her from doing what's best for her, and her home life.

No more confessions of love, NONE, because as you have admitted, not only are you inexperienced and uncomfortable, you are also in strange territory emotionally.

Would you ever trust a female that would cheat on her husband with you, physically or emotionally? So don't let those intense feelings over rule your common sense, or get you in deep trouble later.

Leave her alone until she has been divorced, not separated, for a year.