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-   -   What do you do when you wake up thinking about your ex? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=615562)

  • Nov 29, 2011, 05:49 AM
    Ragnvaldr283
    What do you do when you wake up thinking about your ex?
    A year ago, my ex and I broke up, and though I was able to handle it in the beginning, its slowly gotten worse. Not without another's influence though. Two months after her and I broke up, she called me up saying how she was doing and that she was going out with another guy. She also proceeded to tell me that she was sleeping with him as well. This particularly hurt because when I slept with her, I kind of dedicated myself to her from then on.

    In any case, I stopped talking with her and two more months went past when she called me up saying how she was on birth control and all this stuff and I couldn't for the life of me hang up. So, then another three months after that, she calls me up, saying she wants me to go with her to her grandfather's grave, so she doesn't have to do it alone. When we get there, she does her spiel with her grandpa, and I add my two-bits in as well, but, this next part really twisted me up inside.

    While the two of us were standing silently, she started talking about how her boyfriend is being incredibly clingy, selfish, and is taking efforts to know where she is and exactly what she's doing. I talked her through how to fix this (in a way that didn't involve me), and so far, evidence shows she's fine. The thing is the last sign of communication was back in July, with her telling me she needs to speak to me. I don't know what to do. She's hurt me a hell of a lot, she's been known to lie to her own parents and I don't want to take the risk that she won't be honest to me. I know, deep down, she means well. She is not the type to hold a grudge or anything, and ever since we broke up, I literally can't stop thinking about her.

    I have no idea what to do. I've tried moving on, but she always comes back to my head in some form or fashion, and all I want is to fix this all, one way or another.

    Any ideas?
  • Nov 29, 2011, 07:39 AM
    geminichick
    The thing that really bothers me is she calls you and tells you she's with someone else, using birth control and loading all of her issues onto you. You need to block this girls phone number so she can't call you anymore. She's causing you a lot of emotional turmoil and pain by keeping "her foot in the door" so to speak. YOu deserve so much better than her. She obviously does not care about you. She's loading her emotional issues onto you and if she has been known for lying how do you know she is telling you the truth about anything. Do you really want to be with anyone who lies to you? How would you ever be able to trust her?

    Get something out of your life. Make a list of qualities of things your looking for in a woman. Do those qualities match up with her qualities?
  • Nov 29, 2011, 03:42 PM
    talaniman
    Stop letting her use you as an emotional tampon for her feelings, and keeping those feelings stirred up inside you.

    Go NC, (NO CONTACT), and be no longer available for her needs.
  • Nov 29, 2011, 06:26 PM
    Cheeze_Babe56
    If you really loved the girl you would want her to be happy. I know that may sound cleche but it is true. I honestly don't like the guy she is with now. It seems like he is going to give her a lot of heartaches. She sounds like she trusts you and wants to keep you close, but doesn't know what type of guy she wasn't to be with.
  • Nov 29, 2011, 11:27 PM
    vanheart
    "she called me up saying how she was doing and that she was going out with another guy. She also proceeded to tell me that she was sleeping with him as well."

    How nice of her.

    Never speak to this girl again. Period.
  • Dec 1, 2011, 10:30 PM
    pahlp
    She has moved on from this relationship. It's time you did as well. Every minute you waste thinking about would a, could a with her you could be doing something more productive for you.

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