So yeah, here's the thing. Me and my girlfriend have been going out for nigh on 3 years now, and I REALLY like her.

A couple of days ago I went to a party and got absolutely smashed, (this is the first time & probably last time I'll ever be that drunk), and I cheated on her with a girl at the party.

Now, here's my dilemma, I know that the right thing to do is to tell her, and to just take the blame, and most likely lead to the biggest fight of my life. However, I really want to continue my relationship with my girlfriend, because the way I see it, she is the love of my life. So yeah, that's about the size of it. Thoughts?

Also, please no haters saying "omg you're a **** head"... I know I am. I'm just trying to fix things.

If you tell her the relationship is as good as over. While it may be the right thing in one respect telling her is also the wrong thing.

I assume you feel guilty and pretty beat up about it? By telling her you will clear your conscience but you will burden her with your mistake. If it was a geniune mistake and you cannot see it ever happening again then don't share your burden and don't tell her. It's yours now as punishment.

If you want to salvage what ever it is you have left start paying attention to your girlfriend and begin to make her feel loved again.

But before you do anything, ask yourself why you cheated. Being completely drunk is not really an excuse.

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I know that the right thing to do is to tell her, and to just take the blame, and most likely lead to the biggest fight of my life.

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Do the right thing, before someone at the party does it for you. Isn't that worse?

The thing that makes me laugh is you used the word like to a person you have been seeing for 3 years wow.


She will find out sooner or later my advice be a man and take it on the chin

There is no excuse for cheating, claim your mistake. However, don't tell your girlfriend, it will only hurt her, just do right by her from now on, and hopefully you will not become jealous in the future because of your guilt.

As a woman, I feel that you should stronly tell her... no kidding either. You can't force love... If you really do love her, don't hurt her... man up & tell her what you did.. yeah it might cause the biggest fight of your life.. but you can't keep making someone love you with lies... Tell her & whether she wants to forgive you & take you back after that, its totally up to her... but please... do it.. not telling her will only makes things sooo crazy! Even in the near futur... if you guys have a heated argument... you might bring it up, just to make her go crazy in rage... think of the future... remember you can't force love... man up dude!!

I would rather hear it from you than from someone else. If that is ever going to be a possibility, you need to be the one to do it.

Tell her that you don't ever want to have secrets from each other, even if they are difficult to share. You need to let her know that you messed up. "I drank too much and I spent time with this girl and I shouldn't have. I never want to hurt you and now I have with my stupidity. I am so sorry, I hope you will be able to forgive me."

You may not need to go into detail of what occurred, just own up to knowing you made a horrible mistake, that you wouldn't blame her for being angry with you, and that you WON'T drink that much again, not that you probably won't get that drunk again. That's almost like saying you probably won't mess around again.

Either way you take a risk. Someone else might tell her and then she will know you are hiding things from her and wonder what else you may be hiding.

I hope it works out for you. She may or may not be able to forgive you. Hard lesson to learn.

Absolutely agree - if she hears this from someone else the relationship will probably be over.

If you tell her there's a fighting chance.

I never find alcohol to be an excuse for cheating.