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-   -   Men and Porn (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=611449)

  • Nov 11, 2011, 07:50 PM
    sw77242
    Men and Porn
    Okay boys! This ones for you... Why do you watch porn and look at nude pics.. I'm a 26 year old female, and my fiancˇ looks at nude pics on his phone and lies about it. I wouldn't be as upset if he were more up front about it. I'm just looking for some insight. Should I be upset.. Any help on this topic would be greatly appreciated!

    Thanks!
  • Nov 11, 2011, 07:53 PM
    sw77242
    Also, suggestions on how to spice things up..
  • Nov 11, 2011, 08:25 PM
    Fr_Chuck
    He lies about it, because it upsets you. You said if he was honest it would not upset you "as much". But it is obviously that it does, if you let him watch it, without any upset, join him watching then it lets go, anger, guilt and the feeling that there is something wrong about it

    Men like visual images for pleasure
  • Nov 11, 2011, 08:40 PM
    sw77242
    Thank you. I mean I do get a little upset, but I think it's because I don't fully understand why he's watching it you know? I'm not an ugly dog, so I guess I just don't get it. That's why I posted on here.
  • Nov 11, 2011, 08:58 PM
    Wondergirl
    It has nothing to do with you. One guy once said:

    Porn is the just the vehicle that gets a guy where he's trying to go. For a guy, doing it with just your imagination is like going from Detroit to Chicago on horseback. With porn, it's like having your own private jet. It's faster, it's easier, and it's just so much less of a hassle.

    But again, it's not that porn is what's important... IT'S GETTING TO CHICAGO.
  • Nov 11, 2011, 09:18 PM
    Fr_Chuck
    And you will never understand, you just have to know he enjoys it, so let him,
  • Nov 12, 2011, 02:18 PM
    JudyKayTee
    The looking at the photos wouldn't upset me. The lying would. My question would be whether he's lying because the truth would upset you OR because he's embarrassed by his own behavior.
  • Nov 22, 2011, 07:12 AM
    mathewcostin
    Leave the relationship for now. Deal with your emotions about it, work out why you're upset and feel those feelings. Then ask him, will you deal with your addiction and sexual projections at others, or is our relationship over? His choice.
  • Nov 22, 2011, 07:48 AM
    excon
    Hello s:

    I don't know why men do what they do... Do you read romance novels?? Why? Do they make you moist??

    excon

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