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-   -   Confused! Help me get him out of my head! (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=611153)

  • Nov 10, 2011, 04:37 PM
    alinoa
    Confused! Help me get him out of my head!
    Here's the deal, I'm a freshman year student, and HE'S certainly older than me! I saw this guy very rarely each time in the street, he's a beauty king!And me NOT!

    So I was wondering why do you think a guy like him would be locking eyes with me for a while? Why did he look back at me once he had crossed the street that day? Why did he look at me when I was with my sister although they share the same age and MUCH prettier? Why did he look at me when he was in his friend's car, and he leaned over the windshield to finally lean slightly his head? I freaked out and walked away!

    I'm not used to guys looking at me instead of the bombshells beside me! I thought that maybe he was just trying to show his friends how he could play me like a toy! I don't know I'm confused! I don't want to talk about it but I can't help it, he's always running through my head and I don't even know his name ! It seems so irrational! HELP
  • Nov 10, 2011, 05:07 PM
    wyldstallyn
    Maybe you remind him of someone, or perhaps he really is infatuated with you because maybe he finds you attractive! Just because you think he is more attractive than you doesn't mean he can't think or feel the same way about you. Feel confident in that! You have something he likes, so try to figure out what that might be. You're the new girl because you're a freshman and that piques a lot of older guys interests and you're RIGHT! Be on the defense! They could very well be toying with you, but the only way to be sure about your guy is to talk to him! Get to know him, run into him by chance, start up a conversation by just asking him his name.
    I know your heart will probably be fluttering the whole time, but find out what he likes about you! Pay him a compliment to let him know what you like about him, what makes him stand out from the other boys. People usually can't hide their true feelings or intentions forever, can they, so eventually he'll crack! But you have to be strong and try to take it to the next level and talk to him first :) Trust me on this one!!
  • Nov 10, 2011, 06:05 PM
    mmresd
    I think you are obsessing over this. He might have looked at you for over a million different reasons, it doesn't matter what you can assume. Say hi and take things from there.
  • Nov 11, 2011, 09:07 AM
    kcomissiong
    He could have though you were someone else. He could have seen you staring at him and decided to look you over. Who knows what the deal was. The amount of time and attention you are giving to a person you have never met is really overwhelming. Actually meet him before you start analyzing his every move. Speak to him and see if you want to get to know him or if he is actually interested.
  • Nov 11, 2011, 10:59 AM
    talaniman
    You have a combination of curiosity, attraction, and a healthy dose of fear. Say something like "hi", as this is how men and woman interact, to see if they can be friends, acquaintances, or just crushes for a while.

    But beware of older guys who use young girls inexperience against them. Don't be anyone's practice dummy.
  • Nov 12, 2011, 02:19 PM
    alinoa
    You would never believe what happened today,I saw him , I was in the bus and I was starring outside the window and then I saw him standing there alone , he was a little bit far but he was smiling at me ,he leaned his head to the left and grinned then the bus ,he made a sign with his hand to tell me to come to him, I really freaked out!it's like I was paralysed ! Anyway I didn't get out of the bus! Why do you think he wants to play with me when he can have any girl ?(he's HOT) and I was really surprised he recognized me from far! And my hand was covering half of my face! I swear it was like a dream,I was thinking about him and there he was "calling" me! Or perhaps he does that to every girl he sees! Even if he wants to play me , I can't believe such a beautiful boy could notice a girl like me! I always believed that pretty people belong to pretty people , and average people belong to average people ! And FYI: he doesn't know that I am a freshman , we're not in the same college,I think! I talk too much , ain't I?
  • Nov 12, 2011, 02:30 PM
    talaniman
    He may look good and be hot as a firecracker, but that doesn't mean he is a good guy, with good intentions.

    Don't be fooled by your own feelings, protect yourself from the unknown. Good job staying on the bus. Be careful, not foolish, or naïve.
  • Nov 14, 2011, 02:56 PM
    alinoa
    Can a player feel love?advices please!
    This guy and I never officially met , I see him in college with many girls , my girlfriends tell me that he always seems borred to death and that he's always starring at me .We sometimes lock eyes but I always look away , he surely knows that I'm not the type of girl his girlfriends are (physically and mentally), that's why I was wondering why would he be interrested in a girl like me , a girl who doesn't pay attention to his smiles and starry eyes! I mean , there's something about him that's hard to explain , I fell for him the first time we saw each other even if I don't know him ,but I don't want to be another trophy on his list if that's what he wants!what do you think?
  • Nov 14, 2011, 03:34 PM
    talaniman
    Threads were merged together.

    Get over your starry eyed romantic crush and see reality for what it is.

    You are smitten with this stranger and are fantasizing. And you are an easy target.

    To answer your question directly though, players are selfish, and love themselves first, and foremost. You get what's leftover, or just enough to make sure they will get what they want from whomever will give it, with the least amount of effort.

    By definition, they are predators of the weak, naïve, and inexperienced, and unwary.
  • Nov 14, 2011, 03:45 PM
    alinoa
    OK OK no need to be mean! However , you're so right ! I can't thank you enough for your help "talaniman"and everyone else of course! I guess I just wanted to have my fairytale for a moment ! I feel so stupid now for ,me believing in LOVE.I totally forgot that it doesn't exist ! Thank you guys!
  • Nov 14, 2011, 05:02 PM
    talaniman
    Love does exist, its healthy when the two partners are honest, upfront, and loyal. And its real, not hope or fantasy with an unknown stranger.

    Crushes come and go, lust fades, love grows, with healthy adults. You will see.

    I don't mean to be harsh or mean, just direct, and to the point.

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