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-   -   Long distance relationship break-up (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=611064)

  • Nov 10, 2011, 10:43 AM
    sad_panda
    Long distance relationship break-up
    My boyfriend and I have been together for a year and a half. Both are military and have been living together for the past 8 months. He had the opportunity to separate from the military, because his enlistment was up and he wanted to go to school to make something of himself. Because there is no guarantee that I will be stationed in the same place while he's going to school, he moved 16hrs away(driving time), with his sister and her fiancˇ. We decided to do the whole LDR thing, he visited a month after he moved , and one month went by then he said he just couldn't see how this would work because he's going to be going to school(hasnt started yet but will be going in the spring term), working, and is REALLY into working out. I was not expecting this at all and I'm completely devastated. He said its not the right time for us, but it's unfair for me to wait on him to decide when he's "ready". We're still in love and I am not handling things very well. He was my best friend and I feel totally abandoned. What do I do? Wait it out or just move on? I'm SOOO impatient and such a sucker for him. I don't understand how he could just throw me under the bus like that?
  • Nov 18, 2011, 06:23 PM
    gissoo
    If you really love him and he loves you wait to see what happens in future. Sometimes distance makes it hard. My boyfriend broke up with me cause he was far from me but I didn't want to. Anyway wait to see if he will change or his feeling change about you and then make the best decision for yourself.
    I hope it work out for you and your boyfriend. Good luck
  • Nov 18, 2011, 09:47 PM
    Jake2008
    I'm not so sure that this turned into a mutual long distance relationship, or was it more of an opportunity for him to have good excuses to end it.

    Knowing you would be deployed, and perhaps in another part of the world, would likely have resulted in the same situation. If 16 hours away won't work, and he's implied that it won't, what would happen if you were gone a year or more, and a thousand miles away.

    It takes a great deal of commitment, and trust, with no reservations or exceptions, to make a long distance relationship work. Without a solid foundation, it is, in my opinion, next to impossible.

    It all boils down to, how long are you willing to put your life on hold, for a relationship that may never materialize in the future.

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