She won't put me or our relationship first, she is always putting herself first, or her family or her college. I'm not going to make her give any of that up, but I just want a little in return because I've given everything to her, I'm devoting my life to her and I feel like this is just a big school kid relationship to her. I've spoken to her about changing and thinking about our relationship at least 4 or 5 times now and still no change. It was our 1 year anniversary last weekend.. 1 F***ING YEAR AND STILL I'm AT THE BOTTOM! She just won't do it I swear to God she just won't change. The only thing she says after and during these conversations is "yeah I know" and "im sorry I love you" and "yeah I promise i'll change" then after 1 week maybe 2 its back to basics, I treat her like I should ina serious relationship, and she treats me like you would to one of your mates. I haven't seen her since our 1 year that's a week already. I hardly get to see her during the week because of her college, she doesn't even make the effort to see me afterwards. Or whenever I say lets meet up she always says "well I don't know what I'm doing yet". What she should be doing is seeing me. I don't understand it. Also we have tlaks about her moving in with me then saving for our own place just so we can be together. Then she doesn't say anything about it for ages and all of a sudden says "i think its best until afetr my college" which I don't see how because my friend is living with his girlfriend and she goes college so that's just horse ****. I seriously swear this all comes down to her being to afraid to standing up to her mum and the rest of her family. They're so controlling its got to the point where they're practically controlling our relationship, which is suppose to be a serious one. I've waited for a year now and still she hasn't changed. I love her with every inch of my heart and I can't finish with her because I want my future to be with her. But I can't wait for the rest of my life :/

Sounds like your in a rough spot. She's either not ready or willing to do what you want or she's completely rude and selfish and hasn't grown up any. There's women that would really appreciate you so tell her if she can't be one of them its time for you to move on. No time wasting your life on her if she's always going to have you at the bottom I swear other women make me furious with that kind of crap!! No wonder there's so many guys not willing to do anything anymore. I hope this helps you!:)

I'm going to take a different approach than missbanks...

It sounds as though you and your girlfriend are at two different stages in the relationship. I think you may have put too much into it assuming she would do the same. "Devoting your life to her" may be overwhelming her.

Have you considered that she may be perfectly comfortable with the amount of involvement the two of you have as it is? Your pushing her for more, and insisting that she change, it not likely to result in what you want.

I sounds as though she has a fairly balanced life... family, friends, boyfriend, her own interests, school, work.

Just because your friends live together and go to college, doesn't mean that arrangement would work for her.

Since you are wanting more, and she is content with how things are, you have two choices. Continue as it is, or move on. Do no continue to brow beat her into changing... that is not love... that is control.

If you aren't happy, and you don't think things are going to change (which it doesn't appear will happen), be single so that you can meet someone who is wanting the same level of commitment as you are... and let her be single so that she can do the same.

Yes, I will agree, she may love you to death, but she has her plans and her priority and they are different from what you want.

You sounds like you are telling her to change, not trying to understand or meet her in any other plan but yours.

She is busy with college and to her, education is most likely more important than anything, and it is to many people.

She may just want to date and not give their life to the other yet, and you should know where she is, before you go further in your feelings also.

She may want to date on weekends or when she can for several more years while she gets though college, and then may still expect you to fit more into her schedule than her into yours.

Thank you for your help. I totally love her and I now feel that I can wait for her until she is ready because I'm starting to think that the more I try to talk about these things and try to help her through them, its tearing us apart which I don't want. I love her so much, yes I'm ready for all these things but she isn't and I can respect that and all I want to do now is make sure we can be happy together until she is ready for the next step which is moving in together, and I will help her every step of the way and with anything she finds difficult. She is my soul-mate and I don't want to loose her so I'm just going to have to be a little more patient until she is ready to move on in our relationship. I could never of found such a perfect girl for me, I know I won't feel the same way I do about her with any other girl so this is how I know she's the woman for me so I'm going to keep her close and we will both get through these things as a team because that's what relationships are all about! :D

Have you thought she may want to break from you but too scared to tell you are you manipulitive towards her are you insecure you got ask why she's acting this way you can't put blame on her 2 sides to every coin OK think about your faults what you do while she at college and seeing her friends you need to talk it out and if nothing works finsh for both your sakes!

Hey there. It sounds like her family isn't the controlling one but you are. She wants to do her own things her own way but you're trying to change her. She may not like it. Also she may like someone else. Anyone you can think of that she may like? Just have a sit down with her family and herself and just get all this of your chest to her. Good luck!