I have been with my woman for 2 1/2years. It started hot but we ran into some issues fast. She needed a place to stay with her 3 kids, 4 months into our relationship, and it has been rocky ever since they moved in with me.

I have committed to her but she has real problems with her ex, her kids, and with me. I love her but all the extras are making me crazy.

If you are committed to the relationship and her, would couple's counseling be an idea to work through the issues between you?

Have you tried talking to her about the problems and finding compromises where needed? Does she see the problems the same way you do?

How old are the children and what are the issues with them? Is it the usual discipline issues or are you having problems with in effect being a 'step-father' and the ready-made family?

The ex is something that she has to deal with on her own. You can give her moral and emotional support, but it is her issue. Depending on what the issues are, there are resources available to her to resolve them.

Would it be better for her to get her own place and for you to essentially start over on building the relationship on more stable footing?

It sounds like things have already made her crazy. Have you talked and identified a course of action that would resolve this chaos?

Maybe a third party to help guide you through the process of getting a plan of action that addresses those issues is what you need if you both are having a problem resolving them yourselves.

Sounds like you allowed a crapload of drama to enter your life.
For some fun in the beginning.

Who's in charge of your life, here? Her?

I agree, she has to get her ducks in a row, maybe start over without living together.

Is this who & what you signed up for?
What you really want?

She's rebounded. Has her agenda. Never resolved her past.

If you are tired then leave, you are not married, and those are not your kids. You are not tied to them in anyway.

"4 months into our relationship, and it has been rocky ever since"

After 2.5 years. The negatives outweigh the positives.

Its time to make a plan.

What do you want?