Ask Me Help Desk - Don't want to Let Him Go

Don't Want to Let Him Go

Well, see my boyfriend says he loves me. And he really shows it. But see last night, he was in philly, I guess he has a baby momma there. And he's married, but he's divorcing her. We don't know if the papers came back or not. But anyway, he cheated on me yesterday. He said he was drunk. Then this morning, she tried to get some from him, and he told her to get off him, and his phone is off, but she answers her phone. I love him and he loves me, I just don't know what to do. Should I cheat on him back or something? I just want this to be over I want him and her to be done. Besides she tried to set him up to be killed anyway and he knows it

You'd be smart to get out of this bad situation all together.
Doesn't sound healthy from any aspect...

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Originally Posted by nikki2008498

but anyway, he cheated on me yesterday. He said he was drunk [... ] should I cheat on him back or something?

Being drunk is never an excuse for anything. You should never accept that as a justification for anything. Alcohol doesn't do things, people do things. And two wrong never make a right, so you shouldn't...

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she tried to set him up to be killed anyway and he knows it

Wait wait wait, WHAT? Run. Run like hell. You want nothing to do with this.

There is nothing worse than baby mama drama, believe me when I say this, she will never go away. I understand that you love him and that he loves you and your feeling for him is strong so it is hard sometimes to actually look at the bigger picture and the reality of things but baby girl leave him alone. If this chick is that crazy that she tried to get him killed imagine what she would do to the girl that he is trying to leave her with. Think about yourself on this one. I don't know how long you two have been together or what the real issue is but if this whole I want a divorce thing is recent and or if you two were sneaking around while they were together please believe that this is the beginning of your problems. A woman's emotions is the one thing everyone should be scared of. If he really wanted nothing to do with her and he knew about this whole killing thing he would have taken action. He would have gotten a restraining order and visitation rights for the kids where they do not have to interact with one another. Just think about what I am about to say, if you can stand putting up with this chicks drama for awhile stick around if not bail out now before things get worse.

This is way too much drama to put up with a drunk cheater, who is still married. Were you messing with him when they were together and he has a babies mama on the side too. Too much. Can't you find a decent man to love and be happy with, or do you need a man that bad that anyone will do?

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Originally Posted by nikki2008498

well, see my boyfriend says he loves me. and he really shows it. but see last night, he was in philly, i guess he has a baby momma there. and he's married, but he's divorcing her. we don't know if the papers came back or not. but anyway, he cheated on me yesterday. he said he was drunk. then this morning, she tried to get some from him, and he told her to get off him, and his phone is off, but she answers her phone. i love him and he loves me, i just don't know what to do. should i cheat on him back or something? i just want this to be over i want him and her to be done. besides she tried to set him up to be killed anyway and he knows it

Honey, I relly thing that you should tell him how you feel, I mean by telling him like"baby im jelouse, and well i dondt know what to do and i just want to feel confortable and i really want this thing to finish between you and that girl" dondt cheat on him, that's not the correct way, trust me , and as you said, he love you and you love him, just tried to get your feelings in order and tell him about your feelings

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Originally Posted by nikki2008498

well, see my boyfriend says he loves me. and he really shows it.... he cheated on me yesterday.

should i cheat on him back or something? i just want this to be over i want him and her to be done. besides she tried to set him up to be killed anyway and he knows it

Unhealthy relationship. If you stay, you get whatever happens to you and you cannot complain or lay blame.

Should you cheat back on him?

Id say revenge as a foundational pillar to a relationship is a pretty lousy idea.

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Originally Posted by nikki2008498

well, see my boyfriend says he loves me. and he really shows it. but see last night, he was in philly, i guess he has a baby momma there. and he's married, but he's divorcing her. we don't know if the papers came back or not. but anyway, he cheated on me yesterday. he said he was drunk. then this morning, she tried to get some from him, and he told her to get off him, and his phone is off, but she answers her phone. i love him and he loves me, i just don't know what to do. should i cheat on him back or something? i just want this to be over i want him and her to be done. besides she tried to set him up to be killed anyway and he knows it

Leave him girl, sorry can't change a spot on a leapord. And I am sure that's not the first timed

Are you one those women who say that all men are evil or all the good men are taken or gay? Nobody in this situation is playing with a full deck including you. Nobody in this situation seems to have any value for themselves which in turn leads to no value for anybody else, which is quite clear here.

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Originally Posted by nikki2008498

well, see my boyfriend says he loves me. and he really shows it.

But he doesn’t love you. And you know, and so does everybody else. Let’s quit pretending and just accept it. He doesn’t love you, his wife, his kid, or himself. I know this because of what he puts all you through.

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Originally Posted by nikki2008498

but see last night, he was in philly, i guess he has a baby momma there.

You guess? Your not sure. It’s time for you to start being sure, or more accurately start accepting the reality. He’s got her and probably a few others scattered about.

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Originally Posted by nikki2008498

and he's married, but he's divorcing her.

He’s really not. Start accepting that as well.

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Originally Posted by nikki2008498

we don't know if the papers came back or not.

That tired old excuse.

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Originally Posted by nikki2008498

but anyway, he cheated on me yesterday.

It wasn’t the first time.

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Originally Posted by nikki2008498

he said he was drunk. then this morning, she tried to get some from him, and he told her to get off him,

That’s his story. Not one anyone else would believe, nor should you. If he had sex with her last night he would have done it again.

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Originally Posted by nikki2008498

and his phone is off, but she answers her phone.

It’s ironic that you knew who to call when your married boyfriend was out all night.

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Originally Posted by nikki2008498

i love him and he loves me,

He clearly does not love you.

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Originally Posted by nikki2008498

i just don't know what to do. should i cheat on him back or something?

?? What? How about opening your eyes and getting out of this situation. Cheat on him back? That’s a desperate cry for emotional help. I don’t know how else to describe it. The very fact that you are having thoughts like that speak to the absolute lack of trust and value of this relationship. The fact that you would choose that as an option but not leave him makes me wonder why you feel you have to punish yourself. You can do so much better than this guy or this situation that it’s scary. It also may be scary to take that leap and try but I promise you it’s better than this.

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Originally Posted by nikki2008498

i just want this to be over i want him and her to be done.

It will never be over.

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Originally Posted by nikki2008498

besides she tried to set him up to be killed anyway and he knows it

Yet he has sex with her.