Hi, I have a 4 month old baby who has decided in the last 3 weeks that she doesn't want to sleep anymore. She use to go to sleep by herself or I would sit and pat her with no problems. Lately if I sit with her she fights and fights and screams, if I leave she starts OK but then starts crying until eventually she is hysterical. I have tried wrapping her which she hates now, I've tried leaving her unwrapped but she still fights. If tried getting her to sleep in my arms but she screams and hates that too. Tonight I tried the cry it out method which I found sooo difficult she was hysterical for 45 minutes when I picked her up but she wouldn't settle while being held either so I put her in the cot and rocked her to sleep. And hour and a half later she finally gave up. My main question is do I continue with the cry it out method? Will it get easier? Or is there ANY thing else I could try? I never wanted to do the cry it out way but as she isn't happy with anything I try I don't know what else to do! Please help! Thank you!

It's a learning process for her too. I would stick with the crying out method and it will get easier with your persistence and nerves of steel :). If you give in to this, you will always be giving into her, which isn't a good start in life. I think its called 'tough love'.

Tick

This is a process where she is training you to do it just the way they want. They are finding out now how to control your actions.

1. be sure there is not a medical issue or reason for this.
2. let her cry it out, and she is learning and being trained not you.

Hi karlee and welcome, in addition to the given advice, I would closely monitor the daytime naps and make sure of some activities in the hours before bedtime.

Earplugs are cheap and helpful. Good luck and hang in there.

It is very normal.
But please don't believe that there is only ONE way to deal with it. You do not have to let her cry it out. I coslept with my daughter until she was older and old enough to sleep on her own without fussing. It won't hurt her to cry it out. But it also will not hurt her to answer her cries, help her sleep, be there for her.

It is about what you feel is right. Take everyone's advice, and go with what sounds best for you and your baby.

Good luck!

jenniepepsi, it said I couldn't give anymore rep, but thought it had been a while since I had given you something for your excellent feedback. Yes, I totally agree with what you have said. You have good common sense, girl.

Tick

Aww thanks hon!

Babies cry to communicate to you they need something. Holding, feeding, changing, attention of some kind. Give it to them - every time they cry. Babies need to learn that their needs will be met. Read "The Family Bed" if you have any doubts. In Western society, we carry our children in the womb for 9 months, then as soon as they emerge from that warm, safe environment we dump them into a crib in a room all by themselves. No other mammal on the planet treats their young like we do. When my kids were young they slept in our bed every night. Worked great for nursing too - no crying, no screams, no colic. In fact they slept in our room until they were around 11. Both my now teens are the mellowist, kindest people you'd ever want to meet. By meeting their needs, you teach them to trust. Nurture your child every moment. It won't last long and soon they'll be moving out raising their own kids. Does it feel good to let your baby cry it out? NO? Then why do it?

I would like to thank you all for your thoughts and advice I appreciate it all as I was stuck with what to do. I should have probably mentioned that she does co sleep with me at night in my bed but she would still cry for ages before going to sleep I tried this during the day also with no success. I was making sure she was changed and well fed before putting her down and it wasn't her painful cry it was a frustration cry. The cry it out method really was a last resort as I couldn't get her to sleep without a huge fuss any other way, I would have done anything else. I would like to let you all know that since that night it has been so much easy to put her down. The nxt day her naps went from 15 minutes of just sooking to 10 minutes the next sleep. And today 5 minutes for first sleep and no sooking for second sleeps and at night hardly any fuss at all. I don't know whether Letting her cry it out helped or if it was just coincidence but since that night I am relieved and don't dread bed time anymore. So again thank you all :) hope it keeps up!

Thanks for the update, I'll keep my fingers crossed for you guys.