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-   -   How can you Trust Him? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=60393)

  • Feb 5, 2007, 04:30 PM
    Sweet Like Honey
    How can u Trust Him?
    :cool: What do you do when you can't trust a boy? Is it normal to wonder what he is doing at all times of the hour? How can I feel more comfartable about trusting boys? After one boy proved himself untrustworthy I found myself not trusting any anymore... is that normal? Let me know and thanks
  • Feb 5, 2007, 04:44 PM
    Nosnosna
    Trust shouldn't be automatic... it has to be earned. That's a lesson that we all have to learn, and it almost always gets learned with a fair chunk of pain involved. But, such is life.

    Quote:

    Is it normal to wonder what he is doing at all times of the hour?
    Normal? Sure. Healthy? Probably not. You should keep in mind that until you trust a person, you shouldn't put yourself in a position where you'd need to trust them.

    Put another way:
    Don't date exclusively until you trust the person.
    Don't worry about what he's doing away from you if you're not exclusive... it's not your business at that point :)
    Once you trust him, and you start dating exclusively, you can worry. But you won't, because you already trust him.

    Quote:

    How can I feel more comfartable about trusting boys? After one boy proved himself untrustworthy I found myself not trusting any anymore... is that normal?
    Too normal. We all overreact on trust issues, especially at your age. You have to work on yourself to get past that... it's easy to say that one person shouldn't affect how you think of all people, but it's much harder to actually feel that way. All in all, it just takes time.
  • Feb 8, 2007, 11:02 PM
    talaniman
    By going slow and getting to know someone very well and keeping them at a distance until they earn your trust. Unfortunately many of us learn this after we get our hearts crushed maybe a few times but we learn. Take your time because really what's the hurry?
  • Feb 9, 2007, 07:17 AM
    Bluerose
    The only person you can really trust is yourself. Learn to trust your instincts, your intuition and your gut feeling.

    Having been hurt already it is a case of once bitten twice shy. But you can't go through life worrying about whether you can trust this person or that person.

    Learn to trust yourself and your own gut feelings and life will get easier.

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