Hey everyone,
Please help me...
There is this lad from work and he has liked me for a while now (at first I didn't like him... I always thought it would just be mates) he text me a lot and I would reply but I never gave the flirty or leading him on impression. Then I noticed a month later the texts I had been sending were flirty and I was being flirty with him (subconcsiously, as my friend pointed it out) I then realised I thought about him a lot. He asked me on a date and I turned him down, but foolishy I carried on with the flirtyness. After turning him down the texts decreased and I noticed he was texting my friend, but their texts were innocent he would still act differently around me in work and my texts were still flirty. When I discovered he was texting my friend I felt jealous. And this may sound like its jealously attracting me to him, but I have come to my senses and I really want to be with him. He must feel like I don't want him and I'm just being flirty, but its not like that anymore, but I'm too shy to make the move and I wouldn't know how to word the fact that I've been playing hard to get but know decided I'm crazy about this guy and really want him. Also if he thinks I don't like him, may he be over me? Or getting over me? Or does the fact that he still texts, still looks me in the eye, still gets close, still tries to touch me (not sexually... yet) on the arm, hair whatever, still wants hugs? Does this mean he could still like me and I could be with a chance? But I'm also worried from previous stuff he has said. I'm scared that I like him THAT much that if it went wrong, or he was with me for looks (without sounding bigheaded) or for sex that I fear I could get really hurt, as I'm not sure work relationships go down well, if it did go wrong id still have to work with him? As you can see its on my mind a lot. I've noticed other comments on here by someone called stressed_out, they seem to have a very similar problem with the work relationship fear, although I see stressed_out has other issues such as drugs etc. maybe answers on this my help stressed_out if you read this, any help would be greatly appreciated as I think I need to carry my actiosn out sooner rather than later!

You wrote: if it did go wrong id stil have to work with him?

Forget about everything else you wrote and concentrate on this question that you included in your posting.

You really need to give this some thought and consider that if you get involved with him, it may very well NOT work out between the two of you. Then, what will you do? You both have to work together. You need to seriously consider and ask yourself this: Can you handle working with someone you have just broken up with?

If you cannot, then the answer is, do not pursue a relationship with this man. If you feel you that, even if he dumps you, that you can still work together and be friends, then there is no reason not to go out with him.

Personally, I do not advise people to go out with anyone they work with because if it does not work out, you are stuck. THEN, you have to go look for another job even if you don't want to leave. It is just too messy. What I have found in the past is that the women are always the losers in a workplace romance. They are the ones that everyone talks about and I have seen some women actually lose their jobs over it. It is not fair. It is just a reality.

I hope this helps you out a bit. Please give this a lot of thought before you act on your impulses. Good Luck! :)