Ask Me Help Desk - Marriage near end?

HI everyone. Im new to this, so don't really know what to say. My marriage is going down the pan. Its only been 3 1/2 years, but we seem to have grown apart somewhat. What makes it worse is that we have a son and one more on the way. I love her so much, but she can just be so horrible to me sometimes. I guess I can be the same. She says she loves me, but then tells me id be better off elsewhere. She used to adore me which is what makes it hurt. Anyone have any advice, I'm desperate? Ive started self harming, and don't want to go down that road anymore.

Rich

Get professional help and now too. There is no need to suffer as you two are-- in addition to the poor examples you are giving to your children. If this relationship is salvagable, you will certainly find out at the marriage counselor's and if it isn't, they can help mitigate a more graceful parting, which will be far better for your children. While there is genuine support to be found here, the depth of your concerns needs more than what can be offered here. Please seek out a professional-- it really is that important!

Quote:

Originally Posted by rich_jc

HI everyone. Im new to this, so don't really know what to say. My marriage is going down the pan. Its only been 3 1/2 years, but we seem to have grown apart somewhat. What makes it worse is that we have a son and one more on the way. I love her so much, but she can just be so horrible to me sometimes. I guess I can be the same. She says she loves me, but then tells me id be better off elsewhere. She used to adore me which is what makes it hurt. Anyone have any advice, im desperate? Ive started self harming, and dont want to go down that road anymore.

Rich

Hi, Rich...
I'm going through a similar situation (but, with no kids, Thank God). I know how easy it is to feel like hurting yourself will fix things. I have thought many times about hurting myself too... especially this week. Please don't continue to hurt yourself... it won't help in the end and it will just leave you more broken. I love my husband and he tells me he loves me, and we've only been married for one year. We have agreed to work on it and seek counseling. Please try this as well. We haven't started yet, and I'm having a hard time remaining sure that it will help, but it may be our only hope. Please take care of yourself and work on yourself and your marriage in a healthy way.