My first boyfriend and I have been together for 5 years. We had a long distance relationship. He would come visit me a few times a year and vise versa. Although I always missed being with him and wanted something more. We never left each other because we loved each other. Last year I met this amazing guy who I started going out with after breaking up with my boyfriend. We hit it off very well and it was everything I had wanted. My parents and friends disagreed with my decision and forced me back with my first boyfriend. My first boyfriend was perfect but I had fell in love with someone else. Now we are engaged and he is afraid he is losing interest in me because I am still in love with my ex. My ex still loves me but he still has a lot of growing up to do. What should I do? I don't think I will ever stop loving my ex. We forced each other to stop talking to each other so we would get over each other.

Sorry to be harsh, but you need to do some growing up and not stay in a relationship that you are not committed to. It isn't fair to anybody. The person you are planning to marry deserves your total commitment, trust, honesty, and dedication. If you can't give that to him, then you need to end it and spend some time ALONE figuring out what you really want. Don't run back to your ex to fill the void of being alone, really spend some time figuring out what you want, and healing from this mess.

You shouldn't be engaged, or even in a relationship period, if you are not over an ex. That's not fair!!

Then break up, no reason to be engaged to someone you are not in love with.

Never get into a relationship until you are ready.

You are being unfair to your boyfriend.

Imagine is he was secretly pining over his ex girlfriend. Without you knowing.

How would you feel?

You are lying to him & more importantly to yourself.

Time to grow up, make your own decisions. Don't let your parents decide for you.

" forced me back with my first boyfriend" C'mon, really? Forced you?

Your LD relationship never worked out. Whether they liked him better or not.

If I were you, I would start being honest with your boyfriend & yourself.

What exactly do you want?

Try being single for a while.

Doesn't sound like you ready for either one.

To be honest you really need to grow up and figure out what you want in life. They forced you? I don't believe that crap you did it probably because you felt guilty or you still had feelings for this guy. You are hurting yourself and more than that you are hurting your fiancé. You need a reality check, a slap on the face... If you really want this relationship with your fiancé you need to move on forget about your past, its only going to hurt you. We all know past is not easy to forget but we have to do it for others. Hope this helps you to make the right decision.

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Originally Posted by akings

My first boyfriend and I have been together for 5 years. We had a long distance relationship. He would come visit me a few times a year and vise versa. Although I always missed being with him and wanted something more. We never left each other because we loved each other. Last year I met this amazing guy who I started going out with after breaking up with my boyfriend. We hit it off very well and it was everything I had wanted. My parents and friends disagreed with my decision and forced me back with my first boyfriend. My first boyfriend was perfect but I had fell in love with someone else. Now we are engaged and he is afraid he is losing interest in me because I am still in love with my ex. My ex still loves me but he still has a lot of growing up to do. What should I do? I don't think I will ever stop loving my ex. We forced each other to stop talking to each other so we would get over each other.

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First: No one can force anybody to do anything they do not want to do. So please do not blame your parents and friends for forcing you back with your first boyfriend. No such thing as being forced. That was your decision and your decision alone.

Your ex is your ex for a reason. You guys did not have a full fledged relationship. You only seen each other a few times a year. So not really a long or good relationship.

No more contact with your so called ex. You are engaged at this time with a new love. One that is close by and there all the time I presume.

Your decision is really an easy one.

Joe

I don't blame your boyfriend for losing interest.

He isn't your #1. And feels it.

Engaged? I would put all that off. Seriously.

Until you get your crap together.

"My ex still loves me"

Stop tripping.