Hello, I have been dating my guy for just about 2 1/2 years and just last week he said he needs space and wants to break up. We are a long distance relationship due to college, I go to school in NY and he goes to school in SC. Now he was very upset about having to go on a break and said that it will only make us strong and that he did not want anyone else, but he wants to take a few months to himself. What does this mean? The next time we'll both be home is thanksgiving, he told me to keep in contact with him but its so hard to continue talking to him because it makes me feel as if we are still together but I don't want to lose contact and loose him forever. He promised we would see each other over thanksgiving but that is two months from now. Any suggestions on how I should deal with this because I am a mess and I love him so much and I do not want to give up on our relationship because I know he's the one.

Sorry, but for whatever reason he doesn't know that HE is the one, or you are the one for him. If he did, he wouldn't be cutting you off, and he would be explaining his issues, wouldn't he? That's how healthy couples resolve things to stay together.

He asked for a break, give it to him, all he wants. But you don't have to panic and allow him to make rules, or believe his future promises.

Instead KNOW you are in shock, at the turn of events, and let your own dust settle. Take this as a break up, ACCEPT it, and allow yourself time for the shock to wear off by resisting the urge try and FIX this by talking to him, or impulsive emotional behavior.

In time, as you calm yourself inside, you will have a lot more rational thoughts about the RIGHT ways to move forward. It's a hard emotional, stressful time for you, so let family, and friends help you through it.

This will help you make better decisions for yourself without compromising your dignity and self respect by begging, pleading, or creating a lot of drama, and a cooler head can prevail. One that can understand the facts and cope with the feelings.

Sorry this has happened, but it happens to us all, and you are not alone. Don't think you are.

Should I stay in contact with him?

And be confused and miserable? Why? I would not. He dumped you remember?

I know but it is just so hard, and he asked me not to lose contact with him, he said he wants to get back together just needs some space for right now. Is this bogus or should I believe him

It's a big red flag to me when they need a break and tell you to wait. That's bogus to me and instead of going along with their program, you need your own.

Accepting the need for space is bending over backward to begin with. Following along and sitting in limbo while they take their space, break, whatever, is expecting to damn much from a human being that's in shock, and hurting. Don't you agree?

Heck this was out of the blue, and you still don't know the why behind it. Sorry, but that's not fair!! To hell with that, no matter what his issues are! Always protect yourself, and your heart, against personal motives, and someone's "good" intentions.