I've had suicidal thoughts for so long now, because of family problems etc, I'm scared of what happens when you die, not so much the dying part it self, the problem is the more I think about death the more Ill I'm becoming, yet I want it more to get rid of my illness, it's a violent circle, Please Help Me. :'/

I too suffer from depression and suicidal thoughts. Have you talked to anyone about your feelings? A doctor, minister, priest, rabbi, teacher, etc? There is help out there to aid you in getting better. It can be done. I am in the process of learning new coping mechanisms. Please reach out until you find someone that can help you.
Keep posting as well on here as there are a bunch of good people(I have posted when I was feeling bad and they helped).

Try to find the things you love in your life. Do you have a favorite food, for example I love rasberries so eat rasberrys periodically. Find something to look forward to. I don't know your age but if you are in school try to talk to a counselor. Perhaps you could write in a journal, in the past that has helped me release feelings. I too have gone through tough times with friend and family problems, just work through them. Try to isolate yourself from family if you can t be around them-or sometimes taking to them (make sure they are in a good mood and say it without yelling or blaming) You still have a great life ahead of you, don't waste it by worrying about what happens when you die. Good luck :)