Can I deduct what I paid for child care expenses without our babysitters tax id or ssn?

No you will need their tax id number,

This prevents someone from of course claiming expenses they don't have and also forces people who baby sit to claim that income on their taxes.

If they refuse to give it to you, report them to the IRS, we did that two years ago for a private day care

Many private child care people who operate out of their homes are not licesed or insured even and do not wish to report this income. Thus why many do the baby sitting cheaper than real day care centers

Fr Chuck:

They also want to avoid the often very intrusive state regulation.

However, you are correct; for the most part, they want to avoid paying up to 50 cent of each dollar they earn for taxes.

Forget about that state tax, living here in TN.

The last day care we used was a larger one operated by a church. At the end of the year I asked them for their tax id and they fliped out. Refused to tell me, I copied them on a letter I sent to the IRS about the school and had their ID number in about a week.

Good for you!