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-   -   Child abandonment? (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/showthread.php?t=597553)

  • Sep 16, 2011, 03:23 PM
    Quesion1221
    Child abandonment?
    Question: My husbands ex-wife left, 400 miles away (moved) leaving behind their 2 youngest (8 & 14) with an adult but left their 16 year old alone in a hotel. We went and picked up 2 youngest, what can we do now legally? There is currently a court order for him to pat CS and an order stating she is Cust Parent. How do we change that immediately so she can not return and try and take the kids away? -- We live in Texas. Thanks
  • Sep 16, 2011, 04:18 PM
    ScottGem
    You file for an emergency hearing to modify the custody and support order.

    Did the adult the children were left with willingly turn the children over to your husband? How long has the mother been gone? Did she actually physically move?
  • Sep 16, 2011, 04:57 PM
    Quesion1221
    Do we need a lawyer to file? Or can we go file at the court house ourselves??

    Yes, youngest was with maternal grandma, willing gave her over, 14 y/o was at school, went and checked him out. She just left yesterday at 1 o'clock in THE MORNING! & yes, she physically moved, took HER 3 youngest (from another marriage) got all her & her youngest's clothes and left with a new boyfriend from that area which is over 400 miles away. I read a lot about this but so far seems like it is NOT abandonment since they were left with a "responsible" adult except for the 16 y/o. She has an open case with CPS so of course we reported it to the case worker who also stated it is NOT abandonment and used a different word, sadly she wouldn't point us in the right direction, just advised us to seek legal counsel, which right at the moment we do not have the funds, trying to come up with it ASAP but also trying to do something in the mean time to prevent her frm having the ability to come back and get them. Don't think she will any time soon but do NOT want to take the chance... Thanks so much, all help and advice is more than greatly appreciated.
  • Sep 16, 2011, 05:29 PM
    ScottGem
    You're right its not criminal abandonment. So you can't file for abandonment. But you can use the fact that she moved, leaving the children, as grounds to gain custody. I'm assuming that your husband has visitation rights so that her moving with the children would have violated his rights.

    You can probably file for custody without an attorney at this point. You might check f you have a law school in your area. Many run clinics that can, at least, help you prepare the filings.
  • Sep 16, 2011, 05:32 PM
    Quesion1221
    Ok will do, thanks so much for your input.
  • Sep 16, 2011, 05:39 PM
    ScottGem
    Good luck and keep us posted.
  • Sep 16, 2011, 05:52 PM
    Quesion1221
    I will, think we have found a lawyer... to add to the frustration, she lived about 60 miles from us, so their divorce and the custody arrangement is out of a different county so we have to get a lawyer that will file there and of course every lawyer is telling us they charge additional for that and are wanting a lot up front. However, on the bright side, seems like the lawyers that are asking questions and getting the whole story are pretty interested and wanting to help so think we have found one :)) Thanks again Scott
  • Sep 16, 2011, 06:25 PM
    cdad
    Something is odd. A 16 year old left to their own means is abandonment in the strictest of legal definitions. If the child was left to fend on their own without parental support of any kind and left in a hotel then that parent should be brought up on charges. The child is still a minor. The parent is responsible for them.
  • Sep 16, 2011, 07:39 PM
    Quesion1221
    @Califdadof3: Right, but its in an extremely small town and the 16 yr old has 3 aunts that live there and a gma which is where she is at now. I feel, legally at that moment it was abandonment but as of that afternoon she was in the care of a "responsible" adult (which according to Texas law as long as the parent leaves them with a responsible adult it is not abandonment), and does NOT want to come with us. I'm sure it will help when we go to court but from what I gathered from the research I have done, there isn't much we can do about it now...
  • Sep 16, 2011, 07:52 PM
    cdad
    Your original wording made it sound a bit different. The way you currently state it then I agree. It doesn't rise to the level of abandonment.
  • Sep 16, 2011, 07:55 PM
    J_9
    Your exact wording was...

    Quote:

    left their 16 year old alone in a hotel
    Can you clear this up please?
  • Sep 16, 2011, 08:01 PM
    Quesion1221
    Yeah, sorry, I was a little vague at first, wasn't too sure about this site, 1st time using it... Thanks so much though for your input, truly appreciate it.
  • Sep 16, 2011, 08:03 PM
    Quesion1221
    And @ J_9, she was left ALONE at a hotel... as I stated to Califdad, she was later taken to her aunt's house.
  • Sep 16, 2011, 08:05 PM
    Quesion1221
    Just to clarify: her aunts and gma do NOT live at the hotel but in the small town... she was left ALONE, without adult supervision for several hours before going to her aunt's house.
  • Sep 16, 2011, 08:21 PM
    J_9
    Can I ask why you so rudely disagreed with me? I was only asking a question so that your information could be clarified for the experts in this category.

    Sheesh, I was only trying to help you out!! :mad:
  • Sep 16, 2011, 08:26 PM
    Quesion1221
    Of course you can; I didn't disagree, I tagged as unhelpful because I felt it was unhelpful, I think it was more of a matter of interpretation rather than lack of clarification. I stated that she was left alone and she was... did not mean to offend, and definitely appreciate your eagerness to help.
  • Sep 16, 2011, 08:28 PM
    Fr_Chuck
    Sorry, the not helpful is a comment that a post was bad, that it contained wrong info, it is a fairly serious thing to do and our experts take it very serious.

    If you rate not helpful very often, most experts will stop trying to help you.
  • Sep 16, 2011, 08:30 PM
    Fr_Chuck
    But I will add, a 16 year old, often stays by themselves for a few days, or even watches younger children for a day or two.

    A 16 year old being left "by their self" is not a issue at all.
  • Sep 16, 2011, 08:34 PM
    J_9
    Quote:

    Originally Posted by Quesion1221 View Post
    Of course you can; I didn't disagree, I tagged as unhelpful b/c I felt it was unhelpful, I think it was more of a matter of interpretation rather than lack of clarification. I stated that she was left alone and she was... did not mean to offend, and definitely appreciate your eagerness to help.

    Actually it wasn't unhelpful if it helps clear the issue up for the experts to answer your question.
  • Sep 16, 2011, 08:36 PM
    Quesion1221
    @FR_Chuck, I completely understand but it is obviously there for a reason, J_9 posted that 20 minutes after I had already clarified to the experts that were indeed helping. Again, I feel that comment was unhelpful. I appreciate your feedback though, and yes, I have been researching this issue on several sites and seems as her being left alone for a few hours is NOT an issue however, the fact that her mother left with out intent to return and told no other adults about it IS an issue. We have little in our favor when it comes to the 16 year old & that situation but on the flip side, it does not look good for the mother either... Thanks for the insight.

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