Well we went on a break about 2 weeks ago, we got in a fight and we had been fighting a lot that week. I was being a little jealous and controlling , although I didn't see that then I do now.

She told me we should go on a break because she can't think of anything else to do right now, I said "i don't want to go on a break" she said well I need space its all I can think of.


First week we spoke maybe one text a night, then it went to ever other night, she would say I love you and I miss you. Then she stopped writing back. 2 days ago from today, (being the second week of break) we spoke and she said she missed me a lot and loved me I said the same back



Then the next days she disappears again? What I'm not understanding is why we are still on a break if I've realized my mistake, apologized honestly, and we both love each other?


Last I asked her if I will get a chance to make it up to her she said soon I just can't now.



Im pretty confused, help?

This is the same thing that has happened to me in my relationsip. We were fighting and I was getting jealous over stupid ****. I know breaking up sucks but it really helps you to see things differently. THis will only strengthen your relationship... and you said you were writing to her. Is this a long distance relationship??

Yeah it is newly a bit of a long distance relationship, I just kind of don't know what to do or expect ? As in should I just stop writing her and leave her alone? Is she still truly in love with me and trying to help fix this? I have realized my wrongs over the stupid jealousy **** , and would love to show that I have


I just can't really get her to snap out of the break stage and get back into it.. though I know I can't rush her.

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/dating...ml#post2889627

This is what you told another poster, and you made a few good points. My thinking is when they ask for space, or a break, give them what they ask for, disappear, and have fun doing your own thing.

Lol true.. I need to give the space. I was thinking exactly that, while posted on the other posters question.. that I need to take my own advice.



I guess my question is more.. will she be back. Then again as I told the other poster, I need to do my own thing do what they ask for and if they do come back then its meant to be that way.

Hope for the best, prepare for the worse.

Threads merged and edited to one post, for the entire situation in one place

I posted earlier, about how we went on a break after a fight. Ive accepted that I need, well she needs to be given space. Left alone, and that's what I'm doing now finally.

Her signals though, last we did talk, indicate she totally loves me. I guess my question is, why the break if there's so much love and missing.

I made the mistake in the fight before, and it was a mistake I would say, I won't make but would continue to make. Is it that, I'm being put in my place in a sense?

I wasn't sure if I should add this on to my other post but I figure why not just make it less confusing and re post

Any advice is helpful

Hard to tell if her signals are indeed mixed, or is it your perception of them. I would have to say for whatever reason, she is taking advantage of her space, and you are hoping she comes back soon, based on hope from your last contact. Questions and confusion has you thinking of her words, actions, and motives too much.

You need a useful, productive distraction from your own thoughts, as there is NO TELLING what's going through her mind, or what she is up to.

The thing about giving space, is you must get focused on taking your own space, or else you will dwell on things like her words, actions, and motives, to get any signal as to what she is thinking, feeling, or doing.

When you start to wonder about these things, then it's a sign to stop thinking about her, and physically do something for yourself.

The longer you allow this thinking, the more you over think, and confuse yourself.

This is true I do over think. Specially when it comes to her. Her signals.. to me I mean saying I love you, I wish to hold you , be near you, kiss you missing you so much those seem like signals of I'm into you

But then she goes away

I'm becoming worried and the thought of being in the dark.. is making me over think. I know you are right that I need to remove my mind from the subject, but as busy as my life gets it feels impossible.

Since she still talks to you and you get that feeling that she loves you its seems like she's really just confused. And that she doesn't want to rush back into the relationship on a fear that you will keep making the same mistake. First don't text her. Don't talk to her write/whatever. Make her feel that your feelings for her are gone. Hopefully she will realize wow I really miss you and need you back into my life. If you keep talking to her she knows she has you. But if you stop she's going to just want you back even more

LDs suck.

If you wanted that, then don't be jealous. I don't recommend that situation, anyway. Especially for you.
You knew what you were getting into, right?

Taking a break is a way of not dealing. Even after stupid fights. Sounds like neither one of you are ready for something serious.

Her message is clear. She doesn't want to be tied down. Can't deal.

"Is she still truly in love with me and trying to help fix this?"

No, if she was, you would know. There wouldn't be a break.

Yup, disappear. This wasn't good for you anyway, or her.

Don't wait around.

I last posted about a girl that broke up with me, or "went on relationship break" because we used to fight a lot.

Well, we got back together. She asked me out. The problem is when she asked me out she had another boyfriend..
Im not sure if he knows about me.

He is long distance, and at the moment I am too. I live much closer. The problem being he's coming from another country, to visit her for a week.

She says she's unsure how she feels, and is confused. She needs that week to figure it out.

I don't know what to do? I want to keep her,
But how can I compete with someone who's right there with her?

Here's another perspective on the your situation: Why do you want someone who will cheat on or with you in your life?

She is cheating on someone. Probably him which makes you the other man. Is that really the position you want in a relationship?

You need to walk away as hard as that sounds and let her get over her confusion. Stop allowing her confusion to affect you.

Go No Contact and keep it. Take care of yourself and move forward. Allow yourself to let her go and find someone who knows what she wants. Someone who isn't confused and involved in multiple relationships at once.

Thanks for that. I stay partly because, in the start of our relationship I did this to her. Yet I chose her, and never did anything of the sort again.



At the same time, she's in a rebound in a way. We had just broken up, and gotten together again. She's 50/50

I do love her and I can't see myself just walking away , just yet. If she does choose him that's fine. If she doesn't, I want to stand by her like she did for me.


I guess I'm wondering, if him being there for that amount of time will totally reduce my chances?

It'll be more painfull if you stay... you've investing a lot of emotion if you linger. Walking away now will save you the drama in near future.

This doesn't sound like a healthy exclusive committed relationship, but more a casual dating thing that you are not happy with. You want this more than she does, and you are just one option among many.

Be aware that since you don't own her, nor are there that much, you won't be losing her, YOU ARE SHARING HER, because that's what she wants. If I were you, I wouldn't put all my eggs into her basket, or wrap my life around her. Nor would I worry about what she was doing, or with whom, while I was gone.

She isn't yours to win, hold, or control.

"She's 50/50"

That says it all right there.

She's either all in or not.

You could always flip a coin.